So the old man just walked in on me.. (clean post)

Just found this thread through some idiot's profile...

Oh dear, so many amateurs posting here.

The rules are simple, poker face, maintain eye contact and keep going until you're finished.

5 stars, would read again. :D
 
I'll never forget getting caught when I was living with my dad. He walked in, never said a word, did a 180, and went back downstairs. I went down a few minutes after, sat on the sofa with my brother and dad in the room, and there was a comedy sketch on about masturbation. The comedian had a penis prop and everything.

I was dying inside. I was young though. Got to have only been about 14.

I've never been caught with a girl. I did live on my own in a first floor flat for about a year though. Me and the daughter of the woman living downstairs had a bit of a thing. Nothing serious. Just a bit of fun. I then met someone, and had to regularly walk past said daughter with my girlfriend... oh boy, was that awkward. Said girlfriend cheated on me, and the daughter turned up at my door with a bottle of vodka a week later. Not my proudest moment ever, but hey.
 
Tediore said:
I'll never forget getting caught when I was living with my dad. He walked in, never said a word, did a 180, and went back downstairs. I went down a few minutes after, sat on the sofa with my brother and dad in the room, and there was a comedy sketch on about masturbation. The comedian had a penis prop and everything.

I was dying inside. I was young though. Got to have only been about 14.

I've never been caught with a girl. I did live on my own in a first floor flat for about a year though. Me and the daughter of the woman living downstairs had a bit of a thing. Nothing serious. Just a bit of fun. I then met someone, and had to regularly walk past said daughter with my girlfriend... oh boy, was that awkward. Said girlfriend cheated on me, and the daughter turned up at my door with a bottle of vodka a week later. Not my proudest moment ever, but hey.
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You could have probably made that situation work out for you by inviting her in along with your GF and banging them both at the same time because at the end of the day, they both sound like slags ;)
 
Lethagized said:
You could have probably made that situation work out for you by inviting her in along with your GF and banging them both at the same time because at the end of the day, they both sound like slags ;)
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Not entirely sure how well that would go down, honestly :D

Not sure what happened with the girlfriend situation. One minute, all was well, and the next, I get a phone call saying it's not working out, with no reason. Found out she was cheating from Facebook :eek:

Caught at a time of weakness, really. Already feeling pretty down, and I was feeling pretty screwed over, all the rest of it, and company and alcohol sounded good. Never actually intended for it to happen, but...

It's actually not as bad as it sounds when it's written out like that. Like a holiday romance at home I guess...

You live and learn. Meanwhile, my friend dumped one of the nicest girls I've ever met for no apparent reason. Life is messed up :p
 
My wife caught me recently. I was really embarrassed, she got really upset thinking that 'I don't want her anymore', and the whole thing was really..........uncomfortable. In the end I just made a joke of it saying that it's just as natural as taking a dump and a bog-standard male reaction to being alone in a house for more than 5 minutes.

She saw the funny side in the end and just took the pee out of me :(
 
What a HORRIBLE situation, i could even face looking at him again as all your dads going to think now when he sees you is what you were doing.
 
RopAyy said:
This thread is still delivering! I am happy! ha.

Ive been caught with a girl more times than i care to count!
When i used to live at home my mum was pretty cool, if i was getting laid she would usually have a beer and sarnie waiting for me! =D
She did learn to knock though, i had a girl on the floor near the door and ya know just smashing her pasty and had just hit vinegar face stage so no turning back, then the door opens just as i hit launch in shock i pulled out and fair to say i managed to injure the poor girls eye and the mothers feet........
Mother turned around and left not saying a word and when we finally cleaned up and came down she was more concerned on making sure the girls pink eye was okay! I was in stitches but the poor lass never did call!

Still though, a bloody towel on your chest!! Classic!!
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Probably the most I've laughed at a single post in my life...Well done! :D:D:D

Tears...
 
DreXeL said:
My wife caught me recently. I was really embarrassed, she got really upset thinking that 'I don't want her anymore', and the whole thing was really..........uncomfortable. In the end I just made a joke of it saying that it's just as natural as taking a dump and a bog-standard male reaction to being alone in a house for more than 5 minutes.

She saw the funny side in the end and just took the pee out of me :(
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My mate's Mrs caught him once. Their front door opens into the lounge, and he thought he had a chance to rinse a crafty one out whilst she was doing the shopping.

So mate is on the job, he's an office worker so in his shirt and tie with his trousers round his ankles sitting in the lounge with smut on the telly. Cue her forgetting her shopping list and turning round to come home and collect. His description of the sheer terror he felt when he heard her key sliding into the lock, and he with chap in hand and German filth belting out of the telly was nothing short of priceless.
 
Shameless necromancy of thread, but having just been linked it in thread of the year post, I've spent the last hour in stitches reading this! Absolutely priceless!

I must admit I've never been caught I don't think. Just make sure the parents are out!

Also, I think towel is much more sensible than a sock! Both are ridiculous though!

Get some bog roll!

kd
 
Reading this thread and all the replies made me laugh, unlucky you got caught but if you didn't this thread wouldn't of been awesome.
10/10
 
I've literally never been caught by my parents in my youth but my ex has walked on in plenty of times. After a while I never really stopped to say hi.
 
aaron said:
Got caught by my girlfriends mum while she was on top, thing is my girlfriends house is quite small so when i stay over we sleep on an airbed in the living room.

Her Mum starts to walk down stairs and we hear her so my girlfriend dives off, collects up all the clothes and chucks the covers over us just before her mum walks through the door without knocking. :mad:

What makes it worse is that she only came downstairs to get her friggen polo's.

What makes it even worse is that she sent a text to my girlfriend 2 minutes later saying "you can carry on now! ;)" MOOD SHATTERED!!!! lmao :\

Always have radar mode on at the parent's though, my stepdad had a tendancy of just walking into my room without knocking before my mum told him off haha.
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Epic lol :D
 
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