***The All New OCUK Anonymous Confession Thread!***

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I'll confess to something just to keep the ball rolling, not terrible but I find it funny looking back.

I was on my way round to a girls house my mate had set me up with, I had full intentions of nailing this girl and she knew it, it was a guaranteed lay. I was excited she wasn't a supermodel but a worthy adversary.

So I get there, the house is empty we snuggle up on the sofa watching some **** on tv, I start the leg rubbing then the kissing, fast forward and we go up to her room.

So we're on the bed kissing and I pull her trousers off thinking I'll munch it for a bit then nail her and be off, everyone is happy all going well. Anyway I start taking off her panties and what I'm met with is this giant 70's bush, I mean this thing looked like Kimbo Slices beard. The sight of this thing just made me burst out laughing, she started crying then screamed for me to leave.

I walked to my friends house and got high instead. Needless to say, I never spoke to her again.

FriDec11134455GMT2009.jpg

Kimbo's Beard
 
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Dkore-DeX said:
I'll confess to something just to keep the ball rolling, not terrible but I find it funny looking back.

I was on my way round to a girls house my mate had set me up with, I had full intentions of nailing this girl and she knew it, it was a guaranteed lay. I was excited she wasn't a supermodel but a worthy adversary.

So I get there, the house is empty we snuggle up on the sofa watching some **** on tv, I start the leg rubbing then the kissing, fast forward and we go up to her room.

So were on the bed kissing and I pull her trousers off thinking I'll munch it for a bit then nail her and be off, everyone is happy all going well. Anyway I start taking off her panties and what I'm met with is this giant 70's bush, I mean this thing looked like Kimbo Slices beard. The sight of this thing just made me burst out laughing, she started crying then screamed for me to leave.

I walked to my friends house and got high instead. Needless to say, I never spoke to her again.
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HAHA!

should have kept quiet and gone through with it anway though :p
 
I love the taste of blood...

I love getting hurt physically to a certain degree, i actually laugh hystercially when i get into a fight and get my face beaten to bits.

I won't usually start fighting back properly until the guy is completely freaked out and I'm covered in blood almost.

I love getting scars.

Not much really but oh well, might aswell add a little something.
 
Burnsy2023 said:
There's a sickening one next:

I dont know why, but I find girls smoking a turn on. Its really bizzare but have done since I was about 14. I've never told anyone, I dont smoke, I've never gone out with anyone who smokes, no one in my family smokes. Its very random but it works for me!

Over the years I've discovered various websites for people who share my "interest" but I live in constant fear everytime I fap, not that someone will catch me in the act, but they will see what I was looking at!
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Last time I was in Amsterdam I watched a woman smoking a cigarette with her holiest of holies. I'd completely forgotten about it until now. It was an awesome trip.
 
N19h7m4r3 said:
I love the taste of blood...

I love getting hurt physically to a certain degree, i actually laugh hystercially when i get into a fight and get my face beaten to bits.

I won't usually start fighting back properly until the guy is completely freaked out and I'm covered in blood almost.

I love getting scars.

Not much really but oh well, might aswell add a little something.
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Platinum87, is that you? :p
 
A couple weeks back I'd had a heavy night out on the drink, walked a fair way home trying to hold back from going for a leak. Got back to the house and as I was going through the door my bladder gave in on me. "Crap. Crap. Crap! Ok, it's alright..." I thought to myself. Everyones asleep, mother, dad and sister... When I notice a light in the downstairs hallway and my dad call through to see if it was me! Meanwhile I was still losing liquid like no-ones business and my shoes were getting soggy. I legged it upstairs as quickly as I could, changed my clothes in an instant, back down the stairs to see the carpet had a nice wet trail up the stairs! CRAP CRAP CRAP. Some how I come up with the idea of getting a pint of water and going upstairs, and 'tripping' over the steps so I spill it. I do this, smugly, only to notice my dad see me make a half arsed fake attempt of spilling my drink....

Luckily he had socks on and probably thought it was all water.
 
Burnsy2023 said:
. Then she slipped her thumb in to my unspeakable place. This was not what I had in mind, and believe you me, I was not best pleased.

Needless to say, I threw her off me with such force that she actually flew off the bed, grabbed my clothes and promptly legged it. You just don't go there.

I've seen her in lectures a few times since then and I've not spoken a word to her.

I feel violated.
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I feel violated that you reacted in such a way to what sounded like an awesome situation. Women that dirty are few and far between.

She may have given you a backdoor pass of your own, and she may have been happy to gargle in a hot salt solution to finish off.

Instead you ran away. That my boy is an opportunity missed.
 
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