**The Mental Health Thread**

Soldato
Joined
12 May 2011
Posts
6,178
Location
Southampton
Well I've had a rough 6 weeks. Early September I'm in A&E with food stuck in my throat. Have an endoscopy and I'm told I have eosinophilic Esophagitis (basically my esophagus is inflamed due to a sneaky unspecified food allergy that has no other reactionary affect). I'm talking proton pump inhibitors to reduce acid in my stomach which might have a mild benefit, I can't start the main treatment (Jorveza / budesonide) until the follow up appointment in december. Now I'm pretty anxious that I will get food stuck in my throat again and I'll have another trip to A&E and results in my first panic attack in years when I'm in the office at lunch time.

Two weeks later I'm back in A&E with shortness of breath. Turns out I have multiple pulmonary embolism on both lungs and I'm on blood thinners. I'll be breathless for months whilst the clots dissolve. Signed off on sick leave from work who are being good and giving me full pay.

Currently got a cold which seems to be constricting my throat or airways or something. I can breath acceptably and having been to a&e a further 2 times for my PEs "getting worse" when they were in fact fine I've been assured I'm not going to drop dead.

But I'm feeling pretty tired now and it's only week 4 of this. This is on the back of historic social anxiety issues which are ironically fine now I'm stuck at home!

The good news is that hopefully I'll be put on the Jorveza steroids in December which directly anti inflame my esophagus. The other good news is I've slowly been getting strength back over the last month so hopefully I'll feel better in a month and better still in two months...

Given I feel like my plate is overflowing I'm on the waiting list for NHS CBT therapy (obviously there is a wait for everything) and I've also decided to sign up with Better help even if I have a low opinion of them thanks to their adverts lol. We'll see how it goes.

I just needed to vent really

Well it's now 4 months out from my PEs and my mental health has improved a fair bit now I'm breathing normally (I now get 96 to 99% o2 and heart rate in the 70s when resting which I assume is back to what it was before). I Haven't been to A&E or panicked that I am dying for maybe 2 of those months. My next hurdle is an echocardiogram to tell me what the damage is (if any) to my heart, in a few weeks. I'm exercising without chest pain and otherwise fairly fine other than a lack of stamina and losing energy by the end of the day. But knowing I was referred for the echo doesn't help my health anxiety and being hyper vigilant for anything my body is doing...

I had 6 weeks with Better Help who was not that great. The guy set out a sensible plan - use evidence to show yourself the bad thing isn't about to happen - but I struggle with it when my original problems came out of the blue with no symptoms until it wsa too late. I've now started my NHS CBT therapy which seems more helpful in identifying triggers and things.

Bad news is I will soon be stopping my esophagus meds (steriods) as they're untested for long term use, so my throat will swell back up making swallowing difficult again and make meal times unpleasant. At least I now have the physical strength to deal with 12h without food and water if food gets stuck and being unable to take my blood thinners could put me to the front of the A&E queue should/when food gets stuck again lol. The plan is to eliminate dairy as a common trigger and it'll take 6 weeks for any affect to be noticable in tests.

I spend half my time thinking "I can look at buying a classic car again" or thinking about planning a nearby holiday and the other half thinking I should sell all ny possesions to make my wife's life easier...
 
Soldato
Joined
17 Jan 2006
Posts
4,266
I need some support of some sort....

I've got myself in a bit of a low dark place over the last month or so, I'm not sure what or where I have to go, I know it's a bad thing to do but I got hooked over the years and now I want to put a stop to it and get myself financially sorted this year not just for me but for my kids and wife....

I have been betting for years now but this weekend I shut all my accounts permanently and signed up to GamStop so I don't deposit onto any bookmakers website, I want to be able to save and not touch it but ive always had the urge to sneak into my savings accounts and transfer money, even if it's just a £10 bet here and there. I know that if I can bring myself away from it all then I could easily save £300 per month but I don't know how to start, I enjoy football, watching and playing but that then makes me want to bet...

It's got to the point where I think, what does the wife and kids actually see in me, I've not got money for the last 2 weeks of every month and can't treat my two beautiful kids to a thing

Any help would be appreciated, I can also take criticism so please feel free


Hi, I wish I'd seen your post sooner, as I want to reach out to you to let you know that things can get better.

Well done on making that change and even more so for reaching out, it takes so much courage to open up and be honest about such things. It is all too easy to feel shame and fear and that feds the addiction and makes it so hard to be honest with ourselves when the addiction can be so soothing or provide escape.

If you can get along to a GA meeting it could be incredibly helpful and can provide a lot of strength and hope as you meet other people who understand what you are going through and who don't pass any judgement.

Feel free to drop me a message if you want someone to talk to.
 
Soldato
Joined
24 Dec 2004
Posts
18,965
Location
Telford
Well it's now 4 months out from my PEs and my mental health has improved a fair bit now I'm breathing normally (I now get 96 to 99% o2 and heart rate in the 70s when resting which I assume is back to what it was before). I Haven't been to A&E or panicked that I am dying for maybe 2 of those months. My next hurdle is an echocardiogram to tell me what the damage is (if any) to my heart, in a few weeks. I'm exercising without chest pain and otherwise fairly fine other than a lack of stamina and losing energy by the end of the day. But knowing I was referred for the echo doesn't help my health anxiety and being hyper vigilant for anything my body is doing...

I had 6 weeks with Better Help who was not that great. The guy set out a sensible plan - use evidence to show yourself the bad thing isn't about to happen - but I struggle with it when my original problems came out of the blue with no symptoms until it wsa too late. I've now started my NHS CBT therapy which seems more helpful in identifying triggers and things.

Bad news is I will soon be stopping my esophagus meds (steriods) as they're untested for long term use, so my throat will swell back up making swallowing difficult again and make meal times unpleasant. At least I now have the physical strength to deal with 12h without food and water if food gets stuck and being unable to take my blood thinners could put me to the front of the A&E queue should/when food gets stuck again lol. The plan is to eliminate dairy as a common trigger and it'll take 6 weeks for any affect to be noticable in tests.

I spend half my time thinking "I can look at buying a classic car again" or thinking about planning a nearby holiday and the other half thinking I should sell all ny possesions to make my wife's life easier...

Glad you are doing better mate try and keep as much positivity as you can. Hopefully the CBT will help you tbh I never heard much good about better help. You could ask your mental health team about seeing a Pyschologist not all areas offer it but it can be worth while if you can get it.

Can they not give you something to use on an as needed basis for your esophagus ?
 
Associate
Joined
24 Mar 2020
Posts
208
I need some support of some sort....

I've got myself in a bit of a low dark place over the last month or so, I'm not sure what or where I have to go, I know it's a bad thing to do but I got hooked over the years and now I want to put a stop to it and get myself financially sorted this year not just for me but for my kids and wife....

I have been betting for years now but this weekend I shut all my accounts permanently and signed up to GamStop so I don't deposit onto any bookmakers website, I want to be able to save and not touch it but ive always had the urge to sneak into my savings accounts and transfer money, even if it's just a £10 bet here and there. I know that if I can bring myself away from it all then I could easily save £300 per month but I don't know how to start, I enjoy football, watching and playing but that then makes me want to bet...

It's got to the point where I think, what does the wife and kids actually see in me, I've not got money for the last 2 weeks of every month and can't treat my two beautiful kids to a thing

Any help would be appreciated, I can also take criticism so please feel free

Have you tried a bit of match betting? I used to enjoy a flutter very much but as soon as I started MB I could still bet but I wasn't gambling as if I lost the money was in my exchange account and I slowly started actually making money rather than losing it. I've got absolutely no inclination to make a bet that's a gamble now.

The second the bookies realise what your doing they'll restrict you to pennies or ban you from opening accounts, which definitely feels like a win.
 
Soldato
Joined
24 Dec 2004
Posts
18,965
Location
Telford
is it just me that get the feeling that life no longer intresting
ive not had it before well at least not to this extent, im struggling with it

I get it in waves generally when my Anxiety or intrusive thoughts are high. I find things I would normally enjoy seem pointless. I try and tell myself it’s the Anxiety and it will pass but it’s bloody hard sometimes.
 
Soldato
Joined
2 Dec 2004
Posts
14,132
Location
Under The Desk, Wales
People look at you and say, "you are looking well" when they dont realise the turmoil that is going on within!

25 years i been suffering with anxiety and depression. Tons of ups and downs.

Been on meds all that time. Same one too.

A year ago i decided to cut the dosage down by half. Went one whole year on that. A few weeks ago i cut that again by half!

Its been a bit bumpy but i am really trying not to increase dose. I want to get off of them if possible.

Circumstances of life dont help. They only fuel my mental health issues.

To all those on here struggling through these issues, stay strong people. Persevere. And if need be, seek help. Dont go it alone!
 
Soldato
Joined
28 Dec 2017
Posts
8,677
Location
Beds
Have you tried a bit of match betting? I used to enjoy a flutter very much but as soon as I started MB I could still bet but I wasn't gambling as if I lost the money was in my exchange account and I slowly started actually making money rather than losing it. I've got absolutely no inclination to make a bet that's a gamble now.

The second the bookies realise what your doing they'll restrict you to pennies or ban you from opening accounts, which definitely feels like a win.
While I think this is well intentioned, it may be safer for Minibiker to find ways to step away from betting if he's got to this point :)
 
Soldato
Joined
3 Oct 2005
Posts
6,330
Location
England
Has anyone tried an app called Alena to help with anxiety?
Not heard of it before although it seems vague on the cost (unless I'm missing it but couldn't see it in FAQs)

Years ago I used Moodgym which was free at the time but now costs £21/year by the looks of it.

I am starting to think I should perhaps have a few in person sessions with someone to talk things through :(
 
Soldato
Joined
18 Jul 2021
Posts
4,503
Location
Land of Gin (I wish)
Wish the retired would stop shopping on Saturday mornings and lunchtime. They have almost all week to shop. But no, they decide to shop at the busiest time of the week. Moan all the time. Their attitude is making our MH bad along with some working aged customers.

Even working aged customers say what on earth are the elderly doing shopping on Saturdays!

My parents are retired and they don’t shop on Saturdays as they have common sense, which these others don’t,
 
Soldato
Joined
17 Nov 2003
Posts
5,309
Location
St Breward Cornwall
Wish the retired would stop shopping on Saturday mornings and lunchtime. They have almost all week to shop. But no, they decide to shop at the busiest time of the week. Moan all the time. Their attitude is making our MH bad along with some working aged customers.

Even working aged customers say what on earth are the elderly doing shopping on Saturdays!

My parents are retired and they don’t shop on Saturdays as they have common sense, which these others don’t,

Maybe loneliness in some cases, dunno i sometimes choose a Saturday on the beach in winter rather than midweek as i tend to isolate myself, bet they do Iceland on a Tuesday though for the 10% discount
 

Deleted member 266365

D

Deleted member 266365

Wish the retired would stop shopping on Saturday mornings and lunchtime. They have almost all week to shop. But no, they decide to shop at the busiest time of the week. Moan all the time. Their attitude is making our MH bad along with some working aged customers.

Even working aged customers say what on earth are the elderly doing shopping on Saturdays!

My parents are retired and they don’t shop on Saturdays as they have common sense, which these others don’t,
Last time I looked anybody is allowed to shop whenever they want. Grow up!
 
Soldato
Joined
3 Oct 2005
Posts
6,330
Location
England
I'm getting a sense of deja vu because I swear that comment was posted in TIAM 2023 thread as I replied stating my mum is well past retirement age but still works throughout the week therefore weekends are the only time to shop.

Perhaps there's a deeper issue here that's causing all of this negativity and the problem isn't the elderly but something entirely different? (Like when Aunt Irma is on the way and suddenly everything seems to be annoying and frustrating :o )
 
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