**The Mental Health Thread**

moon man said:
it is something i need to watch as i get so much pleasure out of alcohol but it cant be helping my state of mind (surreal ,detatched ,avoiding social situations)
Click to expand...

Alcohol has been my go to for so much, if I'm not happy or want to fit in socially - to the alcohol I go. And I drink so much, literally drink myself to the point I pass out. Many that I've hung out with just think I'm a heavy drinker, which is true but the reason I drink so much is that I just feel so normal after 3 - 4 pints down me. Once I've had 8 or more I'm in another world which I do like, sadly you can't drink that sort of booze and not expect issues, sadly my blood pressure has gone up and I've had to start cutting it back, so I'm feeling less happy socially now.

so for me booze is social lubricant for me....
 
I had to curb alcohol massively, I would never just consume a few drinks so I'd end up hungover for 2-3 days with a huge sense of guilt even when I'd done nothing wrong and my mindset would be at the lowest which is no surprise with it being a depressant.

@AHarvey I think you're right with our over consumption of all forms of media playing a part, we think it's stimulating but really it's just a huge form of escapism for many. I quit gaming for a pathetic 2 months and felt slightly better for it but replaced that time with things that were no better really so slipped back into the habit, it's another huge problem for me being addicted to certain behaviours and I'll not bother in the slightest with meaningful things that I know will actually improve my life because I've just got zero interest, if it doesn't capture something in me then I can't even find the discipline to perservere with it, this cycle though just leaves you feeling worse each time and is a huge killer of self esteem consistently letting yourself down.
 
iv-tecman said:
Alcohol has been my go to for so much, if I'm not happy or want to fit in socially - to the alcohol I go. And I drink so much, literally drink myself to the point I pass out. Many that I've hung out with just think I'm a heavy drinker, which is true but the reason I drink so much is that I just feel so normal after 3 - 4 pints down me. Once I've had 8 or more I'm in another world which I do like, sadly you can't drink that sort of booze and not expect issues, sadly my blood pressure has gone up and I've had to start cutting it back, so I'm feeling less happy socially now.

so for me booze is social lubricant for me....
Click to expand...

this is totally me
 
Im the same as you guys, but replace alcohol with cannabis. Now i'm a total antisocial wreck, but my doctors suspect Asperger but the nhs refuse to diagnose me. They said these 'symptoms' can come under any other the other conditions i have LOL.
 
You think there is nothing wrong with you at the time, hearing voices, delusions can seem very real at the time. Was diagnosed back in 2008/2009 and have been medicated ever since. Sure I get bad days but you learn to live with the symptoms.
 
Gabbatek said:
Im the same as you guys, but replace alcohol with cannabis. Now i'm a total antisocial wreck, but my doctors suspect Asperger but the nhs refuse to diagnose me. They said these 'symptoms' can come under any other the other conditions i have LOL.
Click to expand...

NHS and GP's are really reluctant to refer to clinics for testing, I had 6 months of private therapy before my GP and clinic closest to me would even look, all my GP wanted to do was prescribe medication, which I did try before finally I'd had enough and went looking for private therapy. I took those online tests back in 2005 and even then I had my own suspicions - after a few years battling with GP's etc I spoke to a very good and very understanding therapist and then after 6 months of 1 hour each week at a great cost to myself I finally got referral - which took in itself an age to progress.

Its a long battle to get what I feel is a closure, I don't want the label or to claim any special or preferential treatment, I just wanted to know myself so as I could accept and try and work out a way to live my life - and it has helped as I no longer blame anyone or myself for the problems, but I look to see how I can overcome the problem - doesn't mean I live without routine or don't let my OCD or ways rule me, as they do. But I accept why I need to be like that, and why I'm not receptive to personal space invaded or touch, or have very poor eye contact and can be very socially awkward. I can have very bad days, and I can meltdown over what to some is a very trivial matter, to me is a combination of a lot of stuff just bubbling away and I finally snap, sadly some do not take kindly to it, I feel like everything has gone black, and afterwards I've had those who see this say - do you know what you just did? to which I mostly respond I don't know, I don't remember.. Its not nice. The meltdowns are a terrible aspect of my life. And its not easy to sometimes stop them ...
 
Gabbatek said:
Im the same as you guys, but replace alcohol with cannabis. Now i'm a total antisocial wreck, but my doctors suspect Asperger but the nhs refuse to diagnose me. They said these 'symptoms' can come under any other the other conditions i have LOL.
Click to expand...
No alcohol, or cannabis for me. Mainly I just close everything out completely, don't speak to anyone. Unhealthy really, but sometimes even getting out of bed is an achievement in itself.

Ups and downs throughout the day is commonplace, for no apparent reason. :(
 
moon man said:
not sure how i feel but since my break up i spend my days not bothering to make contact with my fellow humans ,ive got the ocean and the moors and my dog and red wine and its all very surreal ,bitter sweet for sure
Click to expand...
That sounds like heaven to me, tbh.
 
i'm always surprised to see so many people have problems - i generally think (wrongly) that everybody else finds life easy and only i don't. I mentally discount the people i see on the news etc as 'crazy' and not normal, i think in an attempt to separate the majority of people into 'normal' and therefore doing fine and better than me.
I have always isolated myself (especially emotionally) as a defence mechanism and have been struggling for the majority of my 44 years. Things are changing but its slow, and difficult.
even now it feels weird to share this anomalously on the forum (something i've never done before).

one thing i have learnt is that talking and being around people is what i have always wanted and makes me feel a lot better - its finding those people thats the hard thing.
 
aardvark said:
i'm always surprised to see so many people have problems
Click to expand...

Most people will at some point in their life, I guess the other thing with stuff like depression is that people cope with it differently, not everyone mopes around at home etc.. some people will put a brave face on it (as mentioned by another poster IIRC) and you'd not know that they were suffering from it... for example a friend of mine who committed suicide - no one had any idea that he was suffering, he was seemingly able to act as though nothing was wrong when in reality, in private, there was a lot wrong.
 
It is interesting to see some of the names in this thread, people who make eloquent well thought out posts 95% of the time, people that I have a respect for, people that from the outside looking in seem to have their **** together so much more than I do... and then it turns out they're battling the same demons that I am. Its reassuring, but also so immensely sad because I know how bad this feels sometimes, and its a shame to see so many people going through it.
 
Rids said:
It is interesting to see some of the names in this thread, people who make eloquent well thought out posts 95% of the time, people that I have a respect for, people that from the outside looking in seem to have their **** together so much more than I do... and then it turns out they're battling the same demons that I am. Its reassuring, but also so immensely sad because I know how bad this feels sometimes, and its a shame to see so many people going through it.
Click to expand...

That's the mask again. People put so much effort into appearing normal and having their stuff together. That expense of energy itself is tiring, a mental battle and I feel add's the to symptoms.

Talking about it is the best thing.

I'm looking at talking therapy soon as my meds have really helped with the depression, I just need to deal with self-destructive behaviour now, binge eating being one of the worst ones :(
 
I used to binge drink and smoke a hell of a lot of weed.

The weed caused anxiety along with brutal hangovers from the booze. A terrrible combination when you try to function normally.

I gave up both and hit the gym, took a few years until I actually starting feeling normal again.

My GF still smokes weed but it doesn’t bother me. I don’t feel the urge as I know how crap it made me feel in the past.
 
I gave up drink a few years back. I can't remember the last time I had a beer. Gave up the tabs around the time my son was born. Weed will exacerbate my anxiety (and is illegal) so that's out.
I game. I fly drones. I take prescription meds. I vape.
I'm just about managing to hold down a job at the moment but it's not easy.
 
binge eating - yum. I do love to go to supermarkets and buy all my favs and just sit there and binge eat. Doesn't do my waist or bank balance much good, and adding the booze to the trolley doesn't either.

I find gaming and building model kits (Lego mostly) to be a real good way to relax and chill down from any social exhaustion or a long day at work. I think I've given up on any prospect of having a solid relationship, not sure what I'll do about it, no girl can put up with my ways, and the last relationship as I mentioned she had more issues then me, and that really didn't work well at all.

I do feel (as best as I can) for everyone in this thread.
 
Wife just messaged me, our good friends are pregnant with their first, she's asking about trying for a 3rd now... instant kick to the emotional goolies!

I love me kids, but 2 is enough for me. If we had a bigger house and more income/savings etc I'd say yes. She wants 3, I either agree and stop my meds while we try and feel ***** physically and emotionally, or I say no and see her hopes destroyed, calling me stress and destroying me emotionally.

I can go from feeling good to **** in that time :(
 
Skeptic said:
This is a good idea for a thread. I've mentioned before here that I work in the field of mental health / psychology etc.

Please be mindful that your stories, while important and sincere, may trigger negative feelings in others. Could we try and keep messages framed in as positive a way as possible? I recognise that it's tough, but there is always hope.

For some talk therapy works, for others meds, for some both - some don't need anything. It's is not a failure to take medication - in any way.
Click to expand...


I wrote a long post in response to #45 https://forums.overclockers.co.uk/posts/31225530/ mostly relating to an ex who suffered mental health problems. Decided to delete it as it probably wouldn't be too much help for the thread title. Besides, most of what I have to say has already been said on here in the past.

Basically if you're ill, or think you are, go get help, but you have to want it and don't expect a 'cure' overnight, but a long road to successful management.

If you're thinking of getting involved with a potential partner who has a serious mental health problem... just don't. It will be better for you and them. For so many reasons you have very little idea of what you're getting yourself in to. Move along. Kind of harsh but that's my view. ymmv
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom