**The Mental Health Thread**
- Thread starter Gabbatek
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Soldato
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Great news @meh? 
I think something to be mindful also is sometimes things can get worse but you mustn't forget the new skills you've gained, and that you've survived it before. That's a general comment on life, not massively pointed at you!
Today was day one of 4 days off work - went to Staines (90 minute journey from SE London) on public transport. Coming home I realised I'm breathless or heart is racing, so maybe agoraphobia is becoming a reality for me. It's not a far leap from "I don't like commuting or crowds" I guess.
I think something to be mindful also is sometimes things can get worse but you mustn't forget the new skills you've gained, and that you've survived it before. That's a general comment on life, not massively pointed at you!
Today was day one of 4 days off work - went to Staines (90 minute journey from SE London) on public transport. Coming home I realised I'm breathless or heart is racing, so maybe agoraphobia is becoming a reality for me. It's not a far leap from "I don't like commuting or crowds" I guess.
Really struggling at the moment. I guess I'd describe myself as 'high functioning' as I get up, go to work, do the chores, pay the bills to keep a roof over my head etc. I have a reasonable social life, I was out with friends over the Bank Holiday a couple of times.
However, a lot of the time life seems pretty joyless though tbh. I find difficulty and problems (usually unsolvable in my own mind) in a lot of situations. I'm struggling to motivate myself and taking any kind of decision is hard.
I've got two weeks booked off work coming up next week, and I haven't really got any ideas what I 'want' to do... It sucks going on Holiday on your own. Normally I'd load up my car and go down to Cornwall, do a bit of surfing/bodyboarding, cycling etc. (like I did this time last year), but I've gotten some stick from a couple of close friends that 'you always do that', 'try something/somewhere different'. Flying is out, period, and the thought of going solo on a long train journey to a foreign country where I don't know the language is pretty petrifying. So staycaytion it is, I just feel a combination of being overwhelmed with the choice, overwhelmed with the effort of planning it, and not really raising much enthusiasm for another holiday on my own.
However, a lot of the time life seems pretty joyless though tbh. I find difficulty and problems (usually unsolvable in my own mind) in a lot of situations. I'm struggling to motivate myself and taking any kind of decision is hard.
I've got two weeks booked off work coming up next week, and I haven't really got any ideas what I 'want' to do... It sucks going on Holiday on your own. Normally I'd load up my car and go down to Cornwall, do a bit of surfing/bodyboarding, cycling etc. (like I did this time last year), but I've gotten some stick from a couple of close friends that 'you always do that', 'try something/somewhere different'. Flying is out, period, and the thought of going solo on a long train journey to a foreign country where I don't know the language is pretty petrifying. So staycaytion it is, I just feel a combination of being overwhelmed with the choice, overwhelmed with the effort of planning it, and not really raising much enthusiasm for another holiday on my own.
Have you visited the doctors about your low energy levels? It could be that you're perhaps needing something to help give your body a boost whether that be diet or supplement wise.
(I've been working on my adrenals etc which have helped with my energy levels)
With regards to your holiday if you want to go down to Cornwall and do surfing etc then do it. Don't let your friends make you feel like you shouldn't. When I was a kid my parents took us to Devon every year, sure it might have been nice to go somewhere different but we still had a good time
Have you thought about what you want from life in general? I.e. is there anything you want to achieve and work towards? Are you happy in your job or do you want a change from it?
It's ok to not have all the answers right away. Make a plan and just take it a day at a time.
(I've been working on my adrenals etc which have helped with my energy levels)
With regards to your holiday if you want to go down to Cornwall and do surfing etc then do it. Don't let your friends make you feel like you shouldn't. When I was a kid my parents took us to Devon every year, sure it might have been nice to go somewhere different but we still had a good time
Have you thought about what you want from life in general? I.e. is there anything you want to achieve and work towards? Are you happy in your job or do you want a change from it?
It's ok to not have all the answers right away. Make a plan and just take it a day at a time.
Soldato
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I have to admit, I've recently been suffering a bit with depression. Not majorly, but I did have a very low point a few weeks ago, and still feeling down even now.
Everything basically came at once. Work pressures, family illnesses, issues with a few DIY jobs which turned into major headaches. I got so low, in a moment of madness I drove to the next city and booked myself into a hotel for the night just to get away and sleep. Not sure it actually helped, but I came back and slowly got everything sorted.
What really hurt though, more than anything else, was that for the past 8 years I have been supporting someone through a very traumatic event (I know 8 years is a long time, but it involved so much stuff) and that person wasn't there for me when I needed them.
I joined a gym just to focus my mind on something else, and if I get fit at least it will feel like I have achieved something. The change of scenery and routine will hopefully do me good.
Everything basically came at once. Work pressures, family illnesses, issues with a few DIY jobs which turned into major headaches. I got so low, in a moment of madness I drove to the next city and booked myself into a hotel for the night just to get away and sleep. Not sure it actually helped, but I came back and slowly got everything sorted.
What really hurt though, more than anything else, was that for the past 8 years I have been supporting someone through a very traumatic event (I know 8 years is a long time, but it involved so much stuff) and that person wasn't there for me when I needed them.
I joined a gym just to focus my mind on something else, and if I get fit at least it will feel like I have achieved something. The change of scenery and routine will hopefully do me good.
Soldato
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Often is the case, and they probably have become and bit dependant on this and would not even see that you are needing some help and support.
The gym hopefully will help, it's a good way of clearing your head and I always find any exercise is a great way to give me some headspace during and after. Plus, it also gives you a focus in general outside of the normal ****.
I have random moments, like a couple of days ago... I'm on holiday with the whole family, it's great. I'm having to work but hey, it's not too much on that side. I shouldn't be feeling anything but wonderful, but I had one whole afternoon I just felt sick. Not like puke sick, but this heavy, worry filled sick just consumed me. Anxiety was massive and I was struggling to keep it together. I have no idea what triggered it, it was so hard to shake because I had no idea where it came from.
Managed 3 walks so far this month(been house bound for nearly 2 years)it's still not easy but it's a start. Dropped my sertraline to 100mg from 150mg. The doctor in her amazing wizdom told me I can't have any more Valium. So I'm now tapering that, which sucks.
Common story unfortunately, when research chemicals were legal, people with anxiety were stocking up on benzodiazepine pills by the thousands just so they weren't at the mercy of a doctors judgement!
Recently I have found that booking myself into lessons of my hobbies (piano, horse riding etc.) helps with the motivation issues as I am then basically committed to it and worked pretty hard by the instructor!
Been having some manic episodes recently. In my wisdom decided to go kayaking to Loch Laidon which is pretty remote and camp on a small beach for 2 days that's only accessible by water. Didn't occur to me to call home and mobile reception is very poor. As soon as I got back into an area with reception my phone went into overdrive with messages. Facebook hunt and the cops being informed. I hate being like this but the moment takes me and I don't think about how my actions affect others.
Hey all,
I feel so I'll right now, I'm not sure I can put into words what my body feels like.
After spend a large amount of time out of work because of serve anxiety and depression and doing some CBT I thought I was able to return to work, less than 2 weeks in to a part time job I'm feeling horrible, lost sleep, lost weight and sick every day thinking about it.
I want to quit and reset but I'm going to be letting people down and disappointing people.
I feel so I'll right now, I'm not sure I can put into words what my body feels like.
After spend a large amount of time out of work because of serve anxiety and depression and doing some CBT I thought I was able to return to work, less than 2 weeks in to a part time job I'm feeling horrible, lost sleep, lost weight and sick every day thinking about it.
I want to quit and reset but I'm going to be letting people down and disappointing people.
Look after yourself first, doesn't matter about anyone else.
Soldato
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100% this. Anyone who cares about you (or your wellbeing as a colleague) will understand. They wouldn't want you to make yourself worse for their benefit.
In the long run its healthier. I'm terrible at taking time off work when I'm not well but it's necessary and no one will judge you. And if they do, they're wrong.
I've a mate that does stuff like that, he set his android phone up to use location. Anytime he goes off for a jaunt his brother can log in to his google account, check his location history on googlemaps and see where it last pinged. Helps them to see what he may be off doing and no need for the police.
That's a good idea but I use Nokia 8110
I spent way too much time on my iPhone and sold it on the MM. I downgraded to a basic phone with a good battery life. I use it for calls and texts only.Thank you for your support.
I just don't know what to do, I called in sick yesterday and am not due in until Monday now but I can't stop thinking and worrying about it. The problem is I was honest about my time away from work and I feel that I'm going to be letting them down by leaving for my anxiety when I told them I thought I was ready to return to working. I had second thoughts when I accepted but felt trapped.
The progress I felt I had made before this 2 weeks of work is gone or lowered for sure I've not gone out or even wanted to.
Things are horrible right now
.
Soldato
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It sounds like you could do with reassessing your situation from the present, try not to get caught up in the previous stuff as you're moving forwards from that. From what you've told us:Thank you for your support.
I just don't know what to do, I called in sick yesterday and am not due in until Monday now but I can't stop thinking and worrying about it. The problem is I was honest about my time away from work and I feel that I'm going to be letting them down by leaving for my anxiety when I told them I thought I was ready to return to working. I had second thoughts when I accepted but felt trapped.
The progress I felt I had made before this 2 weeks of work is gone or lowered for sure I've not gone out or even wanted to.
Things are horrible right now
- You have a new job who understand your situation and have had a conversation about your anxiety already.
- You've decided to give work a go within that context but it's not going as smoothly as you hoped.
- You've taken a day off to care for the anxiety and been honest with work about it.
That sounds pretty reasonable to me - you've informed work as best you can about your health situation and you're taking decisions to manage it. I think you should try and avoid letting the anxiety about work spiral. You've done all you can to manage the work situation so you can rest knowing it can wait until Monday. In the meantime are there some techniques or thought processes you have for managing the general anxiety?
Hey,
So your correct on the first 2, but I called in just saying I was unwell and being sick. I didn't say it was because I was suffering with anxiety.
You say I can rest knowing it can wait until Monday but I don't know what I'll do on Monday if I still feel the same way? I want to be working and earning a wage but I also don't want to feeling empty like this and fearing the next day.
I had being managing my anxiety and I though I was able to take a step further I know think this was the wrong thing to do and that I should have given my self more time to build into a more settled way of thinking.
But I'm also worried that I will fail again if I give up on this.
I think this could be applicable in here....
Can I ask what a normal amount of time to be upset over a close family member dying is?
My cousin who I was similar age to took his own life 2 years ago this December and nobody saw it coming but it's devastated me. All of my best childhood memories were with him and I can't believe he isn't around any more. As we both grew up we weren't as close but we occasionally bantered away when we saw each other. I feel like I shouldn't still be as upset as I feel inside about it and I don't want to talk to family as I'm bothered I will either upset them talking about him or that I will look weird because they are getting over it and they were just as close if not closer.
Can I ask what a normal amount of time to be upset over a close family member dying is?
My cousin who I was similar age to took his own life 2 years ago this December and nobody saw it coming but it's devastated me. All of my best childhood memories were with him and I can't believe he isn't around any more. As we both grew up we weren't as close but we occasionally bantered away when we saw each other. I feel like I shouldn't still be as upset as I feel inside about it and I don't want to talk to family as I'm bothered I will either upset them talking about him or that I will look weird because they are getting over it and they were just as close if not closer.
There is no normal time, grief is very personal and hits in many ways. Talking about your loss is key to letting go and dwell on the good memories especially with people who knew him.
No one has the same relationship with someone as anyone else either so even if you feel someone was as close as you were to him it will be different. I wouldn't skirt around talking about him and tbh it's natural to want to talk about people who we've lost.
You'll never get over losing him but you will be able to put his loss into a place where you're able to deal with it. Also where you remember him for the good times and not remember or think about when you've been sad. Talk about him whenever you want to.