The Online Dating Journey

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BallistixOnZ490 said:
There's literally prank videos about this where guys get rejected, then their porche, ferrari or whatever pulls up and suddenly the same girl is interested.
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It's perfectly natural and has been happening for millennia, males who can offer more resources attract more female attention. It used to be a sign of competence but nowadays that can be hard to argue when you look at the routes to money and status.
 
Online dating in general has made women pretty entitled imo.

You see fattys demanding guys over 6ft and in shape and i'm sat there like........

raw
 
I tried online dating a long time ago (2004 or thereabouts, long before mobile apps) and found it tough going. Some girls just seemed to want to chat, send pics etc but kept finding excuses not to meet. Others there was just no chemistry in chat, and I appreciate that's a two-way street and I was a bit naive / poor 'chat up game' etc. I think part of the issue was they are probably talking to a dozen other guys at the same time and you never know where in the pecking order you stand, they might want to string you along as a 'backup' option, just like the attention or whatever. So my advice is try to meet up pretty quickly no matter how cute / good a match you think they are. I think I wasted about six weeks talking to one girl before giving up. One I met much more quickly, we didn't click but at least I knew and could move on.

I think you also have to take a decision on whether you want to go with a scattergun approach (contact lots of women with very little effort for each one) or something that is more tailored (commenting on specific things in their profile etc). The latter might appeal to a certain type of girl but is probably wasted effort in many cases.

Obviously times have changed now and the stigma is gone, I imagine for many younger people online dating is probably viewed almost as the 'default' route for finding a partner.
 
HangTime said:
I think you also have to take a decision on whether you want to go with a scattergun approach (contact lots of women with very little effort for each one) or something that is more tailored (commenting on specific things in their profile etc). The latter might appeal to a certain type of girl but is probably wasted effort in many cases.
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I did it years ago and had quite a few dates, I'd pick specific ones I liked, read their profiles and send a little message often mentioning something in the profile.

That was (at the time) a way better approach than just clicking "like" or sending a copied and pasted message. I'd certainly not waste time with back and forth messaging, just cut to the chase and meet up with them. Essentially the first or second message would be an invitation for a date.

I guess these days with the apps it's all about swiping, default scattergun for everyone. Profile pictures and other pictures were still important previously but they're absolutely fundamental now.

I think some guys are probably seriously sabotaging themselves by not putting in the effort to use a good profile photo - lots of research on this out there with stats on what seems to work. Like don't just upload a selfie or start using those dumb snapchat filters... do get a high quality, clear photo of you (not a group shot where your potential date has to play guess who) - bonus points if it's sporty, try to smile... don't need to look directly at the camera, you could try to use a black and white photo they can stand out a bit etc..
 
HangTime said:
I tried online dating a long time ago (2004 or thereabouts, long before mobile apps) and found it tough going. Some girls just seemed to want to chat, send pics etc but kept finding excuses not to meet. Others there was just no chemistry in chat, and I appreciate that's a two-way street and I was a bit naive / poor 'chat up game' etc. I think part of the issue was they are probably talking to a dozen other guys at the same time and you never know where in the pecking order you stand, they might want to string you along as a 'backup' option, just like the attention or whatever. So my advice is try to meet up pretty quickly no matter how cute / good a match you think they are. I think I wasted about six weeks talking to one girl before giving up. One I met much more quickly, we didn't click but at least I knew and could move on.

I think you also have to take a decision on whether you want to go with a scattergun approach (contact lots of women with very little effort for each one) or something that is more tailored (commenting on specific things in their profile etc). The latter might appeal to a certain type of girl but is probably wasted effort in many cases.

Obviously times have changed now and the stigma is gone, I imagine for many younger people online dating is probably viewed almost as the 'default' route for finding a partner.
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Still happens now, during the pandemic plenty of profiles saying,

"Not looking to meet due to pandemic, so dont ask".........So why are you on a dating site!?!?!! Oh.....for attention and validation! Time wasters :rolleyes:
 
HangTime said:
Some girls just seemed to want to chat, send pics etc but kept finding excuses not to meet.
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This generally results in me receiving a message something along the lines of (actual example):

"Hi all
If any of you have me on instagram you might receive a message from someone called ###
with explicit photos and videos of me
please let me know and ignore the message
thank you"

From colleagues... who've been messaging a "girl" on whatever site, been talked into sending compromising photos in return, and then blackmailed for the pictures they've sent them...

How people are that daft I dunno.
 
BallistixOnZ490 said:
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But never mind, keep blaming mine and other 'incels' personalities.

Anyone that does have to put up with the modern Karen, good luck!
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Oh yeah incel thing always makes me laugh. Say anything and it's like YOU ARE JUST AN INCEL, cracks me up cause it's pretty far from the truth being deadly honest.

It's kind of like making any comments about political issues and being called a racist or a bigot etc.

You just have to laugh at it.
 
Im too far away from anywhere, all the profiles would be long distance i imagine.

Where i am from you have to stand in a Pub and hope you get a girlfriend before you get beaten up
 
I think unless you fit a certain classic male look then online dating is going to end up wasting more time than anything you'll get out of it. The only counter to this is to do the scattergun approach.

Ugly looking women stilll get lots of approaches by men so they can still be selective. Though I suspect the quality of men is quite low.

For us fugly guys we get as much attention as there is water in the sahara desert. The best tactic is to get your personality across. Try to make yourself sound unique.

People will come in to your life when you aren't trying and you're being yourself. In other words, don't be jumping up and down while dribbling at the sight of a woman on the horizon.
 
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