The Rise of Lonely Single Straight Men

dacads said:
Can you really have much of a conversation in 5 minutes? Or I guess it’s more a case of you have a longer chat after the initial chats?
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Its more about making an impression, so being able to talk and make women laugh is very important I've found. Some events give you the option to stay afterwards and mingle more. The one I went to about 50% of people stayed afterwards, after all is done you 'mark' what women you are interested in #, they do the same and you'll get notification thing if there's a match 48 hours later and you go from there.
 
Alice In Wonderland said:
Lol! A woman's sex drive increases as they get older. ;)
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Not always. About 15% of women have the same sex drive as the average bloke.

I'm afraid that as they get older it's more likely for the sex drive to drop off not increase.

Hormones and menopause play havoc with their bodies and sex is normally the last thing on their mind
 
I'm just glad I managed to bag one before tinder and all that came out. On paper I'm not much of a typical stud, and am definitely an acquired taste. No way I'd do well on dating apps or speed dating. I managed to wear my now wife down 15 years ago and she's stuck with me now.

I definitely feel for young lads these days. I've watched some colleagues on tinder and they say it's just dire.
 
malachi said:
Yes but its nothing compared to mens sex drive at a similar age. Never has been and never will be. Especially after menopause.

Mens sex drive at 60 years old is WAY more higher than a woman at the same age, as men are designed to make babies till the day they die, so the sex drive is never comparable to women at any age.

Men didn't make that rule, Mother Nature did! :p
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That is kinda true however according to quite a lot of scientific data men typically reach their peak sexual maturity (ability to get hard and stay hard) a lot younger than women, and why so many men will need "help" as you age.

Like the menopause stages though, it seems that it is something that is not talked about very much and again nothing to be ashamed of either!
 
Alice In Wonderland said:
That is kinda true however according to quite a lot of scientific data men typically reach their peak sexual maturity (ability to get hard and stay hard) a lot younger than women, and why so many men will need "help" as you age.

Like the menopause stages though, it seems that it is something that is not talked about very much and again nothing to be ashamed of either!
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Put a slim and fertile 21 year old woman in front of an 70 year old man and lets see if he still needs help getting it up without the aid of modern science :D

Menopause stages are not talked about as often because too many women like to pretend it doesn't happen. Think they will be young forever, they can have kids at any age, they are just as attractive at 51 and if they were 21.....until they get a clear dose of reality from Mother Nature.

We all get old and things will start to fail as we age. Even with the help of modern science but in today's world people think they are going to be young forever just because we live longer.
 
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malachi said:
Put a slim and fertile 21 year old woman in front of an 70 year old man and lets see if he still needs help getting it up without the aid of modern science :D

Menopause stages are not talked about as often because too many women like to pretend it doesn't happen. Think they will be young forever, they can have kids at any age, they are just as attractive at 51 and if they were 21.....until they get a clear dose of reality from Mother Nature.

We all get old and things will start to fail as we age. Even with the help of modern science but in today's world people think they are going to be young forever just because we live longer.
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No one told me about the Peri-menopausal stage and I wish they had!! :cry:

I'm 42 so relatively young for it but you are right, we all age and everything stops working as well as it used to and none of us are invincible.

Hopefully one day, like depression and so on being talked about, people will stop being afraid of talking about what to happens to women and what happens to men. :)
 
One thing I've noticed about dating, and listening to the various conversations about it from both men and women, seems to be an over emphasis on status i.e. how people in general have a first impression of a guy.

So they talk about how a guy should act, look, speak etc. But many of these conversations never account for situations were those aspects weren't a factor.

For example recently in the media there as been a number of cases of female prison officers having relationships with prisoners. One guy was having 2 relationships with 2 different female prison officers at the same time. Both women looked decent i.e. if they wanted a date they could have picked from most guys. But yet they ended up picking the guy in prison and risking their career. The reason we know about this situation is because they were caught, picture printed in the newspaper, and have had short jail sentences imposed on them. So why are these women picking that man over better prospects?

I think as long as a guy is passable in looks (99% of people can at least get to passable), and you're not acting odd, then it all comes down to how you carry yourself.

I think you have to be interested in yourself before others will be interested in you. A lot of guys make finding a woman their mission in life. But doing that neglects the rest of your life. It also kills off a relationship once you get to to one. Guys have to maintain some degree of singularity whether single or in a relationship.
 
I don't know if it's just me, but the very thought of having to go dating just puts me off now.

I just can't be bothered with the rigmarole of trying to get a date, go on said date, find out if there's any "spark" there, rinse and repeat, just ugh. It doesn't sound enjoyable one little bit to me. It's an emotional, financial and time drain as well. Perhaps it's because I've been single for over 20 years now that I'm just used to being on my own.
 
ljt said:
I don't know if it's just me, but the very thought of having to go dating just puts me off now.

I just can't be bothered with the rigmarole of trying to get a date, go on said date, find out if there's any "spark" there, rinse and repeat, just ugh. It doesn't sound enjoyable one little bit to me. It's an emotional, financial and time drain as well. Perhaps it's because I've been single for over 20 years now that I'm just used to being on my own.
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You can apply that to anything in life. If you are not going to try then you are going to get zero results. Dating, applying for jobs, getting that promotion, etc.

If you are happy with that then thats ok :) As long as you are not expecting life to reward you for not making an effort.
 
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malachi said:
You can apply that to anything in life. If you are not going to try then you are going to get zero results. Dating, applying for jobs, getting that promotion, etc.

If you are happy with that then thats ok. As long as you are not complaining expecting life to reward you.
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I know you can, but I'm only on about the thought of dating.

I don't expect any "reward" I'm just one of those people that once they find their comfort zone, I'm quite happy to stay in it. I was just thinking about what it would be like to date again for me.

Perhaps it's the autism. I like routine. I don't like deviating from said routines. Once I find a routine that suits me I stick to it religiously. If things start messing up my routines I start going ape **** and eventually shut down, and withdraw for months on end. Being single means no complications, it's what I've been for 20+ years.

The thought of having to go out on a date and struggling to decipher signals from the opposite sex, which is hard enough to do when you're "normal" but when you're autistic it's a ******* nightmare. Then I have to process what I'm saying as I not sure if what I'm saying is socially "correct" (if that makes sense) All this is mentally draining. It's hard enough just holding a normal verbal conversation with anyone, let alone on a date! All the masking techniques I've built up over the years takes a lot out of me.
 
I am extremely critical of my own looks and that of my close family is this common? I think my dad is an ugly ****** and I was critical of my mother's looks too. I never grew up with my dad as he and my mum were at each other's throats all the time and they split up shortly after I was born.

I'd seen photos of my dad and realised I looked a bit like him and he's an ugly ******. Whereas I look at other people and am not so critical of their looks.
 
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