The rise of OnlyFans

Soldato
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We have been together 17 years now and have two kids together. A relationship is a whole lot more than just sex. You end up in your 40's lonely with no one to share anything with and all the good women end up being taken. I have plenty of friends just like that.

On the flip side, have friends who are 40 plus. They are happy being alone because they had the wife, kids then divorce. Some more than once. They all say "It aint worth the hassle, I'm not doing it again and I'm happier on my own"
 
Associate
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What OF "model" is going to do that for you? I am sure they are using you just as much as you are using them.
Seems awful judgemental against OF women, who are women at the end of the day.
They can still go and do everything you have described as wanting and needing from your wife.
 
Caporegime
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Norrbotten, Sweden.
On the flip side, have friends who are 40 plus. They are happy being alone because they had the wife, kids then divorce. Some more than once. They all say "It aint worth the hassle, I'm not doing it again and I'm happier on my own"
Pretty much every woman... 80% at my job, have had kids then split with their partner in their 40s 50s when the kids have flown the nest .. its completely socially acceptable here. The only ones together seem to be religious in some way.
 
Soldato
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I think your assumptions in your post show how arrogant you are to the notion of OF girls.
That is the feeling of the majority of men and women.

I think you're conflating what an OF girl is. You've kept talking about dating, or marrying these girls. From my understanding OF girls are selling created material, not going around having sex with people.

You're promoting the negative image that you're condemning others for reacting to.
 
Soldato
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Pretty much every woman... 80% at my job, have had kids then split with their partner in their 40s 50s when the kids have flown the nest .. its completely socially acceptable here. The only ones together seem to be religious in some way.
I've noticed in Nordic culture, from friends, that the line between friends and partners can be blurred.

The women I've known from that part of the world have little objection to having relations based on friendship, were as in a more western Christian influenced country there seems to be stricter social rules between men and women ie friend zoning.
 
Caporegime
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The feeling that someone who does OF work cant provide a reasonable experience as a husband or wife...

Comedy gold that.

He hasn't explained it very well and I'm not entirely sure if this was the angle he was going for, but I imagine there would be a significant percentage of people who wouldn't marry an OnlyFans worker (if you ignore the fact the majority would likely never even have the opportunity to) or user. YouGov used to have couple of polls relating to this which showed that the majority of people in the UK still have very negative attitudes towards sex work. It was these two articles, but I can't access them now so don't know if they've been removed:

2dNMEFH.png


It's good that people like you and me are more progressive, but it's certainly not the prevailing attitude.
 
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Caporegime
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I’m almost 40, my long term partner and I own a home together, my dinners on the table regularly, and I have fathered 3 children.

I think your assumptions in your post show how arrogant you are to the notion of OF girls.

Just like your assumptions that people who are happily married are simps and only with fat women.
 
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Maybe he's forgotten OF girls are normal people who have lives and relationships.
As far as I can tell, a majority of users on this forum claim they are not normal people nor can have a normal relationship.
UK still have very negative attitudes
You could have ended the sentence there mate, same delivery :D

It's good that people like you and me are more progressive
I dont think progressive is the word myself.

But yeah I wont ever judge someone for who they are, what they have done, experienced whatever whatever, thats not kind to do.
All humans, including the judgemental ones in here, come with baggage, history, ups, downs. To me, its part and parcel of being a human.

Just like your assumptions that people who are happily married are simps and only with fat women.
Except that's not what he said now is it. Or at the very least you have decided to not confirm the context so it appears that Hurf is being disrespectful to all married people.
Niceeeee.
 
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Caporegime
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You could have ended the sentence there mate, same delivery :D

I dont think progressive is the word myself.

But yeah I wont ever judge someone for who they are, what they have done, experienced whatever whatever, thats not kind to do.
All humans, including the judgemental ones in here, come with baggage, history, ups, downs. To me, its part and parcel of being a human.

I'd rather not just give one sentence replies without giving further context, because then I'm no different to others who make up claims or just assume that's the majority position.

Progressive is absolutely the word for it, i.e. modern ideas about how things should be done, rather than traditional ones.
 
Caporegime
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In that situation I think too many guys get wrapped up in their own heads, and it's made infinitely worse when they're perpetually online.

The best thing they can do imo is work on themselves and stop thinking about finding love/a relationship, they need to find a passion that gets them offline and helps them self improve. Once they start to feel happier in themselves that becomes noticeable to others in a variety of ways, it can have a very positive effect on a persons social life. I'm a great believer that a person should have at least two active hobbies, and that at least one of them should involve some sort of exercise. Hit the gym and lift, take up cycling or swimming or something. It makes you feel better mentally and physically, and greatly increases confidence in those lacking some once they get into the habit and stick whatever it is out. Many of these activities have excellent opportunities for socialising and making friends too. You're going to find healthier relationships when you're in a positive place, and while that might be hard wallowing is self defeating.
Online is getting bad.

There was an article other day about kids (young teens I think) giving up their phone for a few days. Some of them got so anxious about losing their snap chat "streak"they got friends to sign in and maintain it.
They got so anxious about missing out on texts.
So many couldn't do it.


That's really really bad. And it really bolster the calls to ban smart phones for teens.

Many of us are aware that social media has a negative (often) influence on mental health. But sounds much much worse than I thought
 
Associate
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I'd rather not just give one sentence replies without giving further context, because then I'm no different to others who make up claims or just assume that's the majority position.
Completely fair, sure you can see my joke attempt with it!

Progressive is absolutely the word for it, i.e. modern ideas about how things should be done, rather than traditional ones.
Yeah you are right.
I dont like it though, we say progressiveness like I am something more or less than previous generations.
When the truth is, it never mattered in the first place.
 
Caporegime
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He hasn't explained it very well and I'm not entirely sure if this was the angle he was going for, but I imagine there would be a significant percentage of people who wouldn't marry an OnlyFans worker (if you ignore the fact the majority would likely never even have the opportunity to) or user. YouGov used to have couple of polls relating to this which showed that the majority of people in the UK still have very negative attitudes towards sex work. It was these two articles, but I can't access them now so don't know if they've been removed:

2dNMEFH.png


It's good that people like you and me are more progressive, but it's certainly not the prevailing attitude.

When you're looking for a partner it's natural to have "filters". Broad brush criteria where you might lose some good catches.. But overall you get rid of the chaff.

For guys that would often be "weight" and for women, "height".

OF worker falls under this I think. From my perspective (which may be wrong) OF types are often arrogant and narcissistic. Not all. But it certainly feels like most. So it's easier to just filter that out.

Dating is hard enough and a waste of time most of the time even after effective filtering.
 
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Soldato
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7th Level of Hell...
My wife will ring me at work asking me when I am coming home and when I get home the dinner is ready on the table.

Damn gender role enforcement TBH :p

We pretty much do everything together bar some hobbies.

So all the non-fun stuff? :confused: ;)

p.s. the above 2 are just tongue-in-cheek :)



...and I have fathered 3 children.

Is the long term partner you are currently with their mother or are have you split with their respective mother(s)? Or are they now all adult children living their own lives?

I only ask due to the way you have written what you have.


On the flip side, have friends who are 40 plus. They are happy being alone because they had the wife, kids then divorce. Some more than once. They all say "It aint worth the hassle, I'm not doing it again and I'm happier on my own"

Pretty much every woman... 80% at my job, have had kids then split with their partner in their 40s 50s when the kids have flown the nest .. its completely socially acceptable here. The only ones together seem to be religious in some way.

I know a couple of older couples (60+) who, when asked, say they would never marry their husband/wife again.... It appears a LOT of older couples just stay together because its "comfortable" and are too scared to split up. They would rather just plod along in denial.
 
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Associate
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OF worker falls under this I think
For you and others that wish to be judgemental.

For reference, you are all classing all OF women as the same, when they really are not.
Yes you do get the arrogant narcisstics ones, but to say every single one of them is like that, is probably unfair at the very least.

Damn gender role enforcement TBH :p
or she's kicking out her affair.... DUN DUN DUNNNNNN
 
Soldato
Joined
22 Nov 2007
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4,139
I would forget about dating any women, invest in a gym membership and start going there.



Well that's life. Happens to everyone, from dating to applying for jobs. You keep on trying.

To use a footballing analogy. Theres only so much a manager can do with average/crap players. If i was the guy i would be dating in my league plus trying for 5-10% better.

He needs to eat more, he looks super skinny.
 
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Caporegime
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For you and others that wish to be judgemental.

For reference, you are all classing all OF women as the same, when they really are not.
Yes you do get the arrogant narcisstics ones, but to say every single one of them is like that, is probably unfair at the very least.


or she's kicking out her affair.... DUN DUN DUNNNNNN

No I'm not. I'm saying that from my perspective, it appears that most are. And that applying this filter to dating is better than not as maybe 1 in 20 may not be.

There are too many lifestyle (work hours etc) and personality attributes (high chance of narcism, myself not matching their criteria) that the filter is sensible.

When there are 1000s of women you might find on a dating app... You have to filter. You'll waste too much time if you don't.
 
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Soldato
Joined
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3,069
Seems awful judgemental against OF women, who are women at the end of the day.
They can still go and do everything you have described as wanting and needing from your wife.
Is it really hard to grasp that a woman that does porn for a living will most likely not share the same traits and priorities as a homemaker?

Most women would not date someone unemployed and poor and most men would not date a sex worker. It's very simple.
 
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