Tinder?
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Soldato
well that goes without saying really!
assuming she is fit....dammit actually pop up a pick, just briefly and well judge!
Ask your wife what you should do
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just msg him??? - nice cowardly way to handle it
catch yourselves on. you will only make a potential bad situation worse. if anything needs to be said, say it to the mates missus first, she may well burst out laughing and say 'yea we did that for a laugh'
if you're not convinced then go to the mate directly and speak to him like an adult. if you haven't the guts to speak to him face to face they keep your gub shut and say nothing.
.......msg him.....jesus the world we live in.
I would have spoken to a mate directly btw note I said "This basically" not that I would only message my friend. But thanks for quoting me as if I said that.
Given I lost a friend who killed himself who was a forum member recently who lived in NZ over a women being a bell online isn't called for. Notice that it may be the only method available to some people when distance is a factor. Or lets all be alpha and not think about the reason someone might use that method.
Soldato
LOL why would u not tell your best mate about his wife being on tinder?
So much for being a mate of any kind by not telling .
So much for being a mate of any kind by not telling .
So you'd rather jump to conclusions and potentially ruin your mate's marriage over what could've been a simple prank on a a night out with the girls?
Some mate you are
Soldato
Thats not your fault though or anyones if telling your mate about there missus ends tragically.
First of all real mates wont moan and befriend you if you tell them such things.
second of all, a sound well down to earth person would just break off his marriage/relationship when finding out such a thing or work on it. Not take there own life or do something really stupid.
Both points has nothing to do with you so clear your concious, man up and tell your mate the truth(aimed at the OP)
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So you'd rather jump to conclusions and potentially ruin your mate's marriage over what could've been a simple prank on a a night out with the girls?
Some mate you are
Aren't you jumping to conclusions that it was a simple prank on a night out with the girls?
Soldato
So you'd rather jump to conclusions and potentially ruin your mate's marriage over what could've been a simple prank on a a night out with the girls?
Some mate you are
Jump to what conclusion?
Its fact. Is the missus on tinder? yup? proof? here is screenshots. done.
Make up what you will with the info. its not jumping into any conclusion, its putting factual information on the table for his mate to know about(if he doesnt or not)
end of.
So you'd rather jump to conclusions and potentially ruin your mate's marriage over what could've been a simple prank on a a night out with the girls?
Some mate you are
How is he jumping to conclusions? "I saw your wife on Tinder". He did see his mate's wife on Tinder.
How is that jumping to conclusions? It may or may not be anything other than a prank, as you said. But surely his mate is in a better position to judge what is or isn't harmless. His mate is likely to be thankful that you're watching his back.
Soldato
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Sadly in my friends case I feel it was not having the same group of friends to be able to directly talk about all aspects of his life that was more the issue but he would have preferred to have been told what was happening then find out and suddenly make a rash and sudden mistake with no one to talk to but that's another story. He had some hidden demons sadly.
Soldato
you said 'this basically' while quoting the chap saying to send the mate a message - nowhere in your post did you mention you would speak to the mate directly rather than messaging him - therefore I think it was a reasonable enough assumption to make that you agreed with the notion of sending a message.
I'm genuinely sorry to hear you lost a friend in NZ over a woman - but I did not know that in advance, so calling me a 'bell' is a tad out of order- though to be honest even if I had known my stance would still be the same. sending this sort of information to a friend in a message is not on.
no, sorry. if they are that good a friend and you really feel that it is in their best interests to be told you make a phone call if distance is an issue. you go out of your way to speak them.
nothing to do with being all Alpha
it is more to do with doing the right thing. if you feel the friend needs to know, then be a friend and an adult and tell them, either face to face or at the very least make a phone call. sorry but if you are really a friend then there's no good reason to pass this kind of information on via a message. keep it to yourself until such times as you can see or speak to them. but you know if it makes you feel better by calling me a 'bell' well good luck to you
Soldato
you not reading any of what i and others have said on why he should do it?
Indeed, but if their relationship is already under strain and something like this comes to light then it could be the final straw, even if it was just a prank. Not a chance I'd be willing to take.
Obviously if you talk to her about it and she gets all defensive about it then you know something's up and it's probably worth bringing it to his attention but she might just say "oh crap, I forgot about that, that was me messing about with the girls on a night out to see who could get the most interest", in which case she'll probably rectify it there and then and it's over and done with. If she then wants to tell him about it that's up to her.
//I should add that I know the wives of most of my friends very well and in most cases have done for years, so keep that in mind when reading my post. If it'd been some chick I had no idea about then yes, your approach might be the correct way to do it.
Are you married Foxeye?
Soldato
Conversely what if she is having the same conversation on Mumsnet about seeing your picture on tinder!
Soldato
assuming you are married/partnered up that is
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