Why cant i get a girlfriend?

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Shep_Cobain said:
I didnt care for two and a half years but now im getting bored. When all my mates dont come out because their seeing their girlfriend im lonesome... and no i dont have any female friends that i hang about with. All my mates are lads.
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I'm pretty much in the same boat, but luckily this boat has a broadband connection and pron galore.

Yes a lot of jerks have girlfriends, which might make you think, i'm a better person than that guy, why don't I have a girlfriend.

Well my friend, that's how the world works, and how girls work, they make no sense, so just roll with it.

You have 2 options, get frustrated, look at every girl as a potential relationship, appear needy and push most girls away, which leads to even more frustration.

Or! Don't give a **** and just be happy, find something you enjoy doing, a hobby. It's cliche I know, but only you can make yourself truly happy, just the way if someone offends you, you can get sad/angry/laugh, that person didn't choose what you felt, you did.
 
Shep_Cobain said:
Mate... that was an example of why i dont want the internet to find a girlfriend..... :confused:

Not saying its what i would do but giving an example of what other people can do etc.
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Do you not see the irony here? You are asking people to diagnose you when you could be putting forth any information and we would be none the wiser - equally remember that it could be none of the people here have valid advice for you, they could all be pretending (I'm sure they aren't but still...). My advice was and is to ask your friends, they are much more likely to have a decent useful view of you and your issues than random people here who are relying on the information you have given.
 
Shep_Cobain said:
But as i said i deal with the general public all the time. I speak with my mates girlfriends, all the people in my full time job are women!
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It's not the same as having females mates. People you would contact, who know you, who you have personal discussions with and socialise with.

People at work and gf's of mates is very different to the above.
 
krooton said:
It's not the same as having females mates. People you would contact, who know you, who you have personal discussions with and socialise with.

People at work and gf's of mates is very different to the above.
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yeh but.... what im trying to say is all the girls i work with give me lessons day to day...

Also.... there daughters who are of the same age or younger come in and i can flirt fine with them but there just friends - no attraction for me really - nice girls but not my type.
 
Girlfriends are overrated anyway. I went for the fiancee and 2 kids package and now wish Id stayed with the live at home and play xbox. (joke :) ) The grass is always greener. When I was in Uni I used to always want a girlfriend to do relationship stuff and got hung up about it. In hindsight if I spent the time jsut enjoying what I wanted Id have probabl just met someone.

Just relax and do what you like.
 
Shep_Cobain said:
no hobbies. Dont have any lol... just see my mates and do whatever... go park and play footy, go out in cars for a cruise. Go beacon fell for a walk etc. Just an outgoing friendly guy basically.
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So these intelligent, interesting women your after, would read that and think "Wow he sounds like my kind of man"........I think not.
 
[TOUGH LOVE]

You're looking in the wrong places.

And making assumptions like 'the only thing good looking girls do is go clubbing' is the stupidest thing I've heard for a while.

Step out of your stigmas and assumptions and try something new. Join a gym, take up a sport or hobby.

Oh, and I hope you do more than ask how someone is doing before asking for their number. Tried... flirting?

Might be an idea to tone down the judgemental pap aswell.

[/TOUGH LOVE]

Ant :cool:
 
Shep_Cobain said:
yeh but.... what im trying to say is all the girls i work with give me lessons day to day...

Also.... there daughters who are of the same age or younger come in and i can flirt fine with them but there just friends - no attraction for me really - nice girls but not my type.
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But you don't need to be attracted to a girl to be her friend.

The female contact you do have is situational, either at work, or with your mates.

You don't have any self-selected female friends who you see on your own terms, if you see what I mean?
 
krooton said:
But you don't need to be attracted to a girl to be her friend.

The female contact you do have is situational, either at work, or with your mates.

You don't have any self-selected female friends who you see on your own terms, if you see what I mean?
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yeh i understand what your saying bud. But... none of my mates actually have friends they see who are girls. Except there own girlfriends who they met through another friends girlfriend randomly one night.. not set up....
 
You make online dating sound as if you spend the entire relationship online and there's no face-to-face contact. I too wasn't sure it would work for me, but it has.

I don't understand what's wrong with being able to see someone's hobbies, likes, dislikes, even their grammar skills before you even think about talking to them. the ice is virtually broken for you and you already know what you might share! My current girlfriend and I met online, through a dating agency. We had face-to-face contact after about half a dozen emails and since then things have gotten better each day.

It's like so many other things in life - you get out what you put in - and if what you put in is desperation for a girlfriend.......well, you're already getting pretty desperate results :)
 
Shep_Cobain said:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=9204832

l_7dd9248da46b6d03a52036ae79af39a0.jpg


thats my myspace profile. The pictures are from like 2006 however ive changed a little but still the same body shape etc. Just matured in the face.

Thats me in mid 05. Just casually relaxing with a bottle of beer at my mates house with him n his girlfriend.
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To be fair, you're not a bad looking guy. I think you're searching for something that should come naturally.
 
I think ill quit while im ahead. I dont see why any guy cant get the girl he wants, and theres no person in particular i want ... just a nice person who is good looking and fun to be with. I do look at some of my mates who have girlfriends sometimes and think how can you put up with that moaning.

and granted i feel lucky sometimes. but hey... like most of you guys have said... im sure the girl will come to me one day :)
 
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Shep, you're not the only who feels that way (from your OP). And I have yet to find the solution - all my "things" have been short encounters that never last long really anyway. I'm bored too and want a girlfriend too (wanna hook up? xD) but I'm just going to go along with things, maybe find some sort of club/activity which interests you and meet females there?
 
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