Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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Last time I was on POF was a few months ago, there was one girl who had a lot in common etc etc so thought I'd try be the first to make contact.

I did, got a reply, two more times and then they stopped.
I asked her that Id prefer to know if she wanted to stop talking, just reply with a "yes" if you really have to. But not even that, waste of time, I didn't even want a reason just a response answered with one word.

Unlike a lot of people I do write a lot more than usual, although I was told this is ok to do by the above.
Given up now, clearly not a place for me!
 
Rosbif said:
I've been blown out once and that was to the only woman I've actually pushed for a meet. She claimed the location was unacceptable. Might be true, might not be, but I've already made the call that this venue is the only one *I'm* prepared to meet at. (Its a pool hall. I can't be arsed sitting on my backside talking to someone. I gotta be doing something like an activity. Otherwise its like a sodding interview, LAME. Plus girls are crap at pool and I like to win :D)
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This, coupled with your attitude towards dating makes me shocked your single.. No, really - It does :rolleyes:
 
ChrisJSY said:
Last time I was on POF was a few months ago, there was one girl who had a lot in common etc etc so thought I'd try be the first to make contact.

I did, got a reply, two more times and then they stopped.
I asked her that Id prefer to know if she wanted to stop talking, just reply with a "yes" if you really have to. But not even that, waste of time, I didn't even want a reason just a response answered with one word.

Unlike a lot of people I do write a lot more than usual, although I was told this is ok to do by the above.
Given up now, clearly not a place for me!
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Why not just have a standard message you can send to anygirl you think looks interesting (same idea as a cv). You know -

Hi ****,

just saw your profile I think you look interesting because *************. If you're interested in meeting up for a drink let me know.

Cheers ****

Done :D

That's quick and if they're not interested they won't reply - win win situation.
 
I met my wife in Lineage 2 MMO, she moved over here from the usa after many months of talking and visiting each other. We've been married now for a year and half.

Not quite a dating site but still true love found on the net :)
 
secretspy said:
the 6 month thing it where if you dont find love you get 6 months free

omg i just found his profile its BS. he said hes not afraid of commitment but thats the issue he has now. he said he hates liars but he did lie about a couple of things yesterday that i picked up on

he says on his page hes looking for friendship and a relationship but hes told me he doesnt think hes ready for the latter.
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Out of interest would you prefer it if a guy said to you: I'm sorry I'm just not that into you Or made an excuse like I'm not ready for commitment etc?

As a bloke I'd rather go for the second one as it's less harsh...
 
I'm giving up for a while. Been on numerous dates with some lovely ladies. Most of them would have been ideal a few years ago, however at the moment I enjoy a date then lose interest almost straight away.

I'm pretty sure it's down to my last long term relationship being such a drain on my physically and mentally plus I'm enjoying being single, I guess. Quite strange too as I don't chase anyone or even make that much of an effort (which isn't like me) yet the girls keep coming back for more!
 
jmhduck said:
Out of interest would you prefer it if a guy said to you: I'm sorry I'm just not that into you Or made an excuse like I'm not ready for commitment etc?

As a bloke I'd rather go for the second one as it's less harsh...
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We men assume it is less harsh, but as someone who has 80% of their social circle being women, I can assure you it does not.

It can make them neurotic, paranoid, and totally sap their confidence when open-ended, wishy-washy BS is used. Be honest and straight-forward, give them the closure they deserve, it's much fairer than having them obsess over what they think they may have done wrong when in fact they didn't.
 
Don't despair you lot! It's been 4 great months for me and my 'net gf.
If you're feeling like no one is messaging you, get off line. Do something to improve your life. Increase your social circle. If still nothing after that, get back online with a revamped profile. If still nothing, change your surname and then date your sister/brother for a bit of confidence.
 
krooton said:
We men assume it is less harsh, but as someone who has 80% of their social circle being women, I can assure you it does not.

It can make them neurotic, paranoid, and totally sap their confidence when open-ended, wishy-washy BS is used. Be honest and straight-forward, give them the closure they deserve, it's much fairer than having them obsess over what they think they may have done wrong when in fact they didn't.
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How would you suggest it be worded then? As this is what I would've said not thinking about feelings to the last girl I dated: "Yeah I thought you were pretty attractive and interesting but now I've got to know you I'm actually not interested at all."
 
jmhduck said:
How would you suggest it be worded then? As this is what I would've said not thinking about feelings to the last girl I dated: "Yeah I thought you were pretty attractive and interesting but now I've got to know you I'm actually not interested at all."
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Lol, you still need tact!

Don't target them specifically, explain how you feel and that you don't think that both of you are really suited for eachother. Tell her you don't feel the spark. They'll understand, as most people have been in the same situation.

Some will still get upset by this of course, but the women who are a bit more mature and understanding of how shizzle works will accept and move on, which is better than messing with their heads.
 
Well bit more of an update...

Now been with the young lady I met off pof for about a month and a half, and it feels like we've known eachother years. Obviously still relatively early doors, but we're fairly inseperable (when work allows) :D

Can honestly say I've never known anyone that I get on with so well, and would never ever have thought the internet was capable of delivering on such a scale...she's definitely a keeper this one.

Hurrah for the internet!
 
doddsy105 said:
lol internet dating = Fail
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Er..lol..it most certainly does not!

The last 4.5 months have been amazing since meeting my guy online, am a very happy lady! Plus since we've been together my social circle has got much bigger and I'm having a great time. Hurray for internet dating!

Oh and Krooton, how's it all going with you? :)
 
tisonlyme said:
Er..lol..it most certainly does not!

The last 4.5 months have been amazing since meeting my guy online, am a very happy lady! Plus since we've been together my social circle has got much bigger and I'm having a great time. Hurray for internet dating!

Oh and Krooton, how's it all going with you? :)
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Double hurrah!
 
jmhduck - I agree with Krooton

Its much "nicer" to be told "im sorry but i just dont feel a proper connection/spark/whatever between us" than "sorry ive decided im not ready for a relationship"

With this recent guy whats annoyed me is within less than a day hes gone from saying "i know ive upset you have a think about what you want to do as i still want to get to know you more. i am looking for a relationship"

to then saying "i dont think im ready to be with someone yet"

translation "im messed in the head, i like to have my wicked way with several women, im a jerk i dont know what i want but i'll carry on doing it because im a d**k"

(sensing the anger ? lol sorry i blame my hormones :D)

on a more positive note - Im feeling much better about it today and im finding match.com much easier than dating direct. especially as it tries to help me find matches (although granted they arent my type but least theyre trying)

currently chatting to a couple of guys. A friend advised if i didnt want to email to just wink so i sent a few and have had a couple of responses.

And ive been looking at who's winking at me and seeing if there's any matchs from them

I also think its nice match do the "if your not interested send a polite no thanks" yes ok its quite disheartening receiving one but least your not ignored

im not getting my hopes up though.
 
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secretspy/krooton I made up some excuses etc although they were all true: I don't know what I want to do with my life and I'm leaving Vienna in 6 months etc. I also have not dated anyone since (it was around Christmas time), I guess this is a bit different from the I'm not ready for a proper relationship...
 
well when i was on dating direct i'd tried to write good emails, commenting on things in their profile etc. and half of them never responded and i was rather tired last night lol
 
Dang! Its not just my inability to write good crap then. Someone else has that skill!

Yep, I have the same problem. Maybe it because we construct the message in such a way that they feel like they are some sort of dumb shmuck, and thus they dont reply!

heh, just came across a corker of a profile, and constructed what is probably some sort of 'loon' message. I suspect its another one doomed for the failure stack!
 
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