Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

SeraphX · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:39

paradisiac said:
well, none of the 3 I was briefly talking to yesterday lasted more than about 5 messages, and most of that was rubbish stuff. I put in some effort and just get back 1 word answers, or something that kind of ends the conversation so im the one left trying to keep it going with something new.

is my profile really that bad?

no laughing at the pics, please for the love of god no laughing

Your profile looks ok, but the pictures need work, you've basically got the same one up there 5 times, Variety is good

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:42

SeraphX said:
Your profile looks ok, but the pictures need work, you've basically got the same one up there 5 times, Variety is good

yeh, im not a photo person, and with a face life mine, can you blame me

im off to Jersey in aug so should have some photos then, but i don't do anything or go anywhere, so really hard to get any 'doing things' photos.

SeraphX · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:45

join the club matey, but photo's of you, no smile, in a hallway or front room aren't going to do much for people looking at them.

Going on just your pictures, i would say, you look bored, or boring, Most women will probably going with boring tbh

Your profile mentions comedy, comedy makes people laugh!
Try to get some shots done outside, with friends? down the pub, having a laugh....

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:49

SeraphX said:
join the club matey, but photo's of you, no smile, in a hallway or front room aren't going to do much for people looking at them.

Going on just your pictures, i would say, you look bored, or boring, Most women will probably going with boring tbh

Your profile mentions comedy, comedy makes people laugh!
Try to get some shots done outside, with friends? down the pub, having a laugh....

I have no friends, my ex saw to that

so its really hard. all my pictures of me out and about are when I had long hair and wasn't appealing at all

cut hair and got a lot more views, and a few messages. but still missing something

SeraphX · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:53

Oh another one eh

(i have the same story, my ex ditched all my friends, 8-9 years ago now)

But meh, get out there and make some more!!

I don't have as many friends now as i did then, but the ones i do have are considerably better.

Failing that, join a club or something, you have interests right?
You work? what about people from work? ( i know this probably isn't ideal, but it's a start)

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 09:57

SeraphX said:
Failing that, join a club or something, you have interests right?
You work? what about people from work? ( i know this probably isn't ideal, but it's a start)

my work colleagues are not people I particularly enjoy spending 5 minutes with at work, let alone out side it

I do have interest im sure, but I don't know what

I used to be heavily into cars, and met most of my old friends through that, but she made us move away from all of them, and now im too poor to even own a car, let alone have money to spend on it

I suppose this is why I thought internet dating would be good, if nothing else might make some friends. but I don't feel its the best way for that.

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:24

well, this shocked me, a lot, but is typical of the people around here

About Me
I am looking for someone who can support me and thier selves financially not because im after the money just because i need a man who makes me feel safe and secure and not just in the honeymoon period neither .. forever I sing, dance and im gerally outgoing. love to have a laugh and do things that are differant Anything else you wanna know feel free to ask me

seriously, support myself sure, but her as well?!? does she not want to have a job?

Narj · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:27

paradisiac said:
seriously, support myself sure, but her as well?!? does she not want to have a job?

Run for the hills!

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:30

PianoBasher said:
Run for the hills!

she probs thought the same when she saw my pic, so win win

grudas · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:45

those pics man!

you need something better for sure something more "natural" now it looks like you're trying to hard

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:46

grudas said:
those pics man! you need something better for sure something more "natural" now it looks like you're trying to hard

that is natural

im just an awkward looking person.

grudas · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:48

bs and you know it

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 16:54

grudas said:
bs and you know it

nah, I hate pics (for obvious reasons) and go all like awkward looking.

Richdog · 10 Jul 2012 at 17:23

paradisiac said:
well, none of the 3 I was briefly talking to yesterday lasted more than about 5 messages, and most of that was rubbish stuff. I put in some effort and just get back 1 word answers, or something that kind of ends the conversation so im the one left trying to keep it going with something new.

is my profile really that bad?

no laughing at the pics, please for the love of god no laughing

My tuppence:

1) Ditch the goatee. While it suits some people down to a tee, on you it has a different effect. Think more Billy Goats Gruff than Johnny Depp. Do yourself a favour and get it off sharpish.

2) Ok, you may be slightly socially awkward and consider yourself unphotogenic, but that is no excuse for carrying yourself like a tard in a photo. ANYONE can look their best in a photo. Fact. Practise your smile in a mirror and aim to smile wide enough to show some teeth, so that your eyes smile too, because at the moment your eyes are not smiling, they are saying "im going to kill you and sodomise your still-warm corpse". To accentuate this, your wallpaper looks like the black and white pictures that they show mental patients before asking what it reminds them of. Finally, try taking your photo with your face tilted to the side, facing directly into the camera is good for passport photos and criminal mugshots. It's not flattering, and you CAN do 10x better.

3) Your profile text. Not at all terrible, but as it stands, speaking objectively as if from a female perspective, there is nothing that catches my eye and makes me think "Ooh i'll message that chap". You say you love stand-up comedy so inject some humour into your profile... you don't have to dramatically change the content, just make the odd quip... you could do it about the horror movies and about the music. As it stands, it's lacking in spark or character.

4) Sort out the spelling and grammar in your profile, you can obviously write fairly ok so don't be lazy. The formatting also looks off, you've inserted a new line instead of a carrying on a new sentence after the end of the old one. If you're going to start a new paragraph then leave a full line of spacing, otherwise follow on from the last sentence. 90% of women won't notice, but the 10% of intelligent women who you want to date will.

5) Don't take the above personally, because we've all been there at some point until we learned how to make the most of what we've got.

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 17:28

Richdog said:
My tuppence:

1) Ditch the goatee. While it suits some people down to a tee, on you it has a different effect. Think more Billy Goats Gruff than Johnny Depp. Do yourself a favour and get it off sharpish.

2) Ok, you may be slightly socially awkward and consider yourself unphotogenic, but that is no excuse for carrying yourself like a tard in a photo. ANYONE can look their best in a photo. Fact. Practise your smile in a mirror and aim to smile wide enough to show some teeth, so that your eyes smile too, because at the moment your eyes are not smiling, they are saying "im going to kill you and sodomise your still-warm corpse". To accentuate this, your wallpaper looks like the black and white pictures that they show mental patients before asking what it reminds them of. Finally, try taking your photo with your face tilted to the side, facing directly into the camera is good for passport photos and criminal mugshots. It's not flattering, and you CAN do 10x better.

3) Your profile text. Not at all terrible, but as it stands, speaking objectively as if from a female perspective, there is nothing that catches my eye and makes me think "Ooh i'll message that chap". You say you love stand-up comedy so inject some humour into your profile... you don't have to dramatically change the content, just make the odd quip... you could do it about the horror movies and about the music. As it stands, it's lacking in spark or character.

4) Don't take the above personally, because we've all been there at some point until we learned how to make the most of what we've got.

nah, I don't take it in the wrong way at all, all criticism is good.

1) I look fat and young without it

2) I do see your point, but smiling? well it makes me look more like a tard (I get dimples)

3) this is where I fail big time. face to face I can say something that is light hearted/funny, but in writing, I get a mind block

4) oh, have I messed up stuff

I thought I had checked it over. will have another look.

Richdog · 10 Jul 2012 at 17:32

paradisiac said:
nah, I don't take it in the wrong way at all, all criticism is good.

1) I look fat and young without it

2) I do see your point, but smiling? well it makes me look more like a tard (I get dimples)

3) this is where I fail big time. face to face I can say something that is light hearted/funny, but in writing, I get a mind block

1) Without it, you look chubby and young. With it, you look chubby, young, and mildly ridiculous. Trust me on this, if there is one thing I know I have (I know it sounds arrogant but I don't mean it that way) it's a good critical opinion on looks based on years of having a lot of close female friends agreeing with said opinions. And no, i'm no Brad Pitt. Never said I was.

2) Yes, smiling. Girls like it. As for the dimples, I have them also. Girls love them. Fact.

3) Stop making excuses and spend some time on it. You make a profile on a dating site, give it a half-arsed attempt, then complain when you don't attract women? Think about it, you're better than that.

4) Good.

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 17:59

Richdog said:
1) Without it, you look chubby and young. With it, you look chubby, young, and mildly ridiculous. Trust me on this, if there is one thing I know I have (I know it sounds arrogant but I don't mean it that way) it's a good critical opinion on looks based on years of having a lot of close female friends agreeing with said opinions. And no, i'm no Brad Pitt. Never said I was.

2) Yes, smiling. Girls like it. As for the dimples, I have them also. Girls love them. Fact.

3) Stop making excuses and spend some time on it. You make a profile on a dating site, give it a half-arsed attempt, then complain when you don't attract women? Think about it, you're better than that.

4) Good.

1) I will give it a go, but if I look fatter

2) I say dimples, I mean craters, and my eyes go all wrinkly. but I will try

3) I actually tried really hard with this profile, you should have seen my other attempts. Im not great with expressing myself in writing. without tone, I come across as rude/arrogant/patronising when in truth I meant it in jest.

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h167/paradisiac82/stuff/bad.png my natural self

see no better at all. (ignore the quality is was a really bad print)

Richdog · 10 Jul 2012 at 18:18

paradisiac said:
1) I will give it a go, but if I look fatter

2) I say dimples, I mean craters, and my eyes go all wrinkly. but I will try

3) I actually tried really hard with this profile, you should have seen my other attempts. Im not great with expressing myself in writing. without tone, I come across as rude/arrogant/patronising when in truth I meant it in jest.

What about this:

I'm originally from Surrey but have lived in Cornwall most of my life, and have lived here for around 6 years. I consider myself to be honest, friendly and genuine with a good sense of humour. I also have two fantastic young boys aged 4 and 5, who stay with me 3 times a week and mean the world to me.

I enjoy watching films, and yeah I must admit I am a typical bloke and enjoy horror and action flicks, although I am partial to a good (sometimes even romantic) comedy too. As for music, while I have a varied taste, I wouldn't say I have a particular genre I prefer over anything else, it really depends on my mood. Speaking of music, i'm also currently trying to teach myself to play the bass... but i'll be honest, I'm along way off being Jimmy Hendrix. I'm also into comedy... from the classic British TV shows, to stand-up. Obviously living in Cornwall going to the beaches is a must, and there are loads around this part to choose from. However, surfing is sadly not in my area of expertise.

I'm looking to meet someone that shares similar interests to me, but I also believe its good to have different ones too... I mean, no one wants to be dating themselves do they? Lets face it that would be a little weird. The kind women I look for someone that is kind, genuine, and funny. Someone that is confident, but not arrogant with it. Someone opinionated (as long as they agree with me, of course ;') ) who can keep a conversation alive about anything and everything they want to talk about.

Ideally I want start with a few casual drinks and get to know the person, and then if we get on then we can see where it leads.

it's not perfect and I don't have time to really put some thought into it (im off out now), but I think you'll agree it has a bit more spark than before, and may give you a bit more of an idea. Note how I change the words like "I will" for "i'll"... it's more conversational and less formal to read.

paradisiac · 10 Jul 2012 at 18:20

Richdog said:
What about this:

it's not perfect and I don't have time to really put some thought into it (im off out now), but I think you'll agree it has a bit more spark than before, and may give you a bit more of an idea. Note how I change the words like "I will" for "i'll"... it's more conversational and less formal to read.

you sir are a star. I will have a play with it.

Saytan · 10 Jul 2012 at 18:21

How not to message

http://www.internetberating.com