Internet Dating.....Who Has Done it?!

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Kimi said:
I just updated the profile txt on my err profile... any better?
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=2939793
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only just seen it so no idea what it was like before but still imo there is a little bit of work to do.

the about me is decent, though i'd loose :p the "A few things about me," and just go right into it. i'd also expand on what crazy stuff you cook.

i'd remove pretty much all but maybe 3 of the images, leaving just maybe the one in the blazer, the close one where you're wearing the black top, and the one in the eve with the group of people, but remove the group of people except maybe your friend and then say which is you. i don't like big group shots, too distracting and you're too small. the other group shot is the exaxt same pose but with sunshades so shows nothing new to the girls. the one cooking shows what? the side of you whilst wearing crazy clothes.

once that's done, there's not really much else that needs to change. like for me and everyone else on here, you'll still get girls not replying to your 100's of messages but at least now you know it's not because of a poorly written profile but because you just generally are pretty rubbish :p

ljt said:
snip.
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yeah it's annoying now that girls are allowed an opinion of what they do and don't like, and us guys want to best show that to them.
 
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Fairly sure the answer is no said:
yeah it's annoying now that girls are allowed an opinion of what they do and don't like, and us guys want to best show that to them.
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It's got nothing to do with them having opinions on their likes and dislikes its more the hoops you have to jump through to get noticed on these things.

The advice that seems to be dished out is don't be "normal" that you must have something to discern yourself from the next guy. What if you like being "normal"?
 
ljt said:
The advice that seems to be dished out is don't be "normal" that you must have something to discern yourself from the next guy. What if you like being "normal"?
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what is "normal"?

i think what is more being said is, don't be normal, not because it's common, but because what people normally put is boring. we aren't exactly saying make huge lies, but just explain what you do better then what is normally put.
 
Fairly sure the answer is no said:
what is "normal"?
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I merely used the word as a reference, it has no definitive meaning, hence the quotation marks. I was referring to people who like things that are common amongst a large population, an average for want of a better word.

For example, things like going to the cinema, listening to music, reading are pretty common hobbies, but if that's all you do and you enjoy it, then why should you have to go out and find a less common hobby just so you have something that's different.

edit: I'd class myself as pretty average with regard to interests, I have no desire to take up a new hobby, I like what I do now, but I wouldn't stand out against the "crowd" on these sites, but I see no reason why I should take up something a little different just so I stood out from that "crowd"

That's the point I was trying to make.
 
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I've literally has the best response ever.

"Sorry I cant talk with you, you look too much like my ex-boyfriend!"

I mean seriously? LOL
 
Kerplunk said:
I've literally has the best response ever.

"Sorry I cant talk with you, you look too much like my ex-boyfriend!"

I mean seriously? LOL
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I had one who replied with just the words gorgeous lol, was a nice reply but not very useful. after a few more we got talking and got facebook details etc and turned out she wasn't so quickly ended that :p i'd feel bad however she clearly chose images that don't show her size so ended up wasting both our time because she didn't want to admit she was a bit overweight.

ljt said:
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we we give it as advice because people ask for ways to improve. it's like saying someone comes on here asking how can i be better whilst wearing a tshirt that says fudge you across the front, we'd most likely say, change tshirts as girls wont "normally" like that, then people come along and go oh why can't he do that, what happens if he likes that tshirt, well he can chose to continue wearing it, but when you ask for advice on how to comes across better we'll give you advice that works. it's not made up random stuff we're saying but from experience this is what we see.

it's also how people read between the lines. someone lists cinema as a hobby, some may read it is this person has absolutely no hobbies so has put cinema which isn't really a hobby unless say you go on average once a week.

if it comes across as though we're saying appear different just for the sake of appearing different then perhaps we've worded it wrong or you've read it wrong.
 
Time for me to update mine now...below is the old profile from when i was on there before... Any suggestions?

I’m an easy going guy, working as a manager in the Logistics industry.

I wear my heart on my sleeve and have been told I have a great sense of humour. I love a bit of banter and enjoy socialising with my friends.

I’m passionate about photography and motorsport, and I enjoy spending time on the track as well as spectating. I am a very active person and like to be outdoors or going somewhere as opposed to sitting in front of the TV.

I love spending time in the city, seeing the sights and taking in the atmosphere, or being by the sea, embracing the wind and spray to finish into a nice bar to warm up and have a few drinks.
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Back on the scene fellas. Broke up with her at 4am this morning and walked around Sutton in the snow trying to find a cab willing to take me back to North London. Eventually had to offer a black cab guy £80 to do it. They all wanted to get off the roads before the morning rush hour dramas start.

So she was unhappy for a while now and was finding fault with everything I do. Apparently, and this is her words, I'm too boring, responsible and act as if I'm 60. Aka, I pay my rent on time (this irritated her, no, it REALLY did), didn't spend every Friday and Saturday night with my head down the toilet vomiting and preferred quiet bars over nightclubs. She still wanted to do all these things and I was 'holding' her back. I said 'off you go then' and walked out. As of this morning I've had over 80 missed calls and 35 Whatsapp messages from her but I'm sticking to my guns. I see no point to go back if I'm not making her life any better and 'holding her back'.

Anyway, dusting off the old Match/Cupid/LoveStruck accounts tonight. Exciting times!
 
robz21 said:
Time for me to update mine now...below is the old profile from when i was on there before... Any suggestions?
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Looks good to me, although I've never really understood what 'wear my heart on sleeve' really means :o I think the amount of info on your profile is good and allows girls to understand what kind of things you're into yet at the same time be able to ask more questions about your interests.

regulus said:
Apparently, and this is her words, I'm too boring, responsible and act as if I'm 60.
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How old are you and how old is the girl?
 
robz21 said:
Time for me to update mine now...below is the old profile from when i was on there before... Any suggestions?
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plenty things i don't particuarily like but each to their own, such as

I’m an easy going guy - who isn't?
I wear my heart on my sleeve - what that mean?
I love a bit of banter - i'd personally say i like to have fun, messing around, anything other then the word banter
I am a very active person - i'd say what i do and let them decide if i'm active or not
 
regulus said:
Back on the scene fellas. Broke up with her at 4am this morning and walked around Sutton in the snow trying to find a cab willing to take me back to North London. Eventually had to offer a black cab guy £80 to do it. They all wanted to get off the roads before the morning rush hour dramas start.

So she was unhappy for a while now and was finding fault with everything I do. Apparently, and this is her words, I'm too boring, responsible and act as if I'm 60. Aka, I pay my rent on time (this irritated her, no, it REALLY did), didn't spend every Friday and Saturday night with my head down the toilet vomiting and preferred quiet bars over nightclubs. She still wanted to do all these things and I was 'holding' her back. I said 'off you go then' and walked out. As of this morning I've had over 80 missed calls and 35 Whatsapp messages from her but I'm sticking to my guns. I see no point to go back if I'm not making her life any better and 'holding her back'.

Anyway, dusting off the old Match/Cupid/LoveStruck accounts tonight. Exciting times!
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you sound like a guy who's making rash decisions now and isn't dealing with the situation very well. you broke up a few hours ago and immediately on a dating website.

sounds to me like she wants you but wants you to say look i can hear what you're saying and i'll see what i can do to be funner, but instead you say screw you i'm going to instantly look for someone else. she sounds like the lucky one here tbh. if i were you i'd tell her you're already online dating and looking for someone else so she need to move on as you're pretending you already have .
 
Wearing your heart on your sleeve means that you do not hide away feelings/emotions and are very open.

Thanks for the input, will have a tinker with some of those points.
 
kitkat9933 said:
The problem is the ratio of Girls:Boys is about 10:1 online. So you have to go out of the way to be noticed.
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I must be really rusty on ratio's because I'm reading the as 10 girls to 1 boy? Surely you mean the other way around don't you?

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If you going to post a profile picture the best advise I can give you is make sure you smile and the bigger the the smile the better. I know it feels silly but when the other year was I internet dating I swapped my profile picture to one where I had the cheesiest grin you ever saw and I was getting at least one date a week sometimes 3 (Match.com)
 
Richdog said:
Well, I had the date with the blonde girl last night... wow, she's amazing... as Jezza from Peep Shows would say... "I love her, I love her" hah. Ok I'm kidding but I really felt the pressure... she is beautiful, intelligent, cultured, the list goes on. Ended the night but can't for the life of me figure out if she really fancies me or not (though she was playing with her hair a lot and body language was alright)... which isn't a good sign for me as usually I know quickly. I think when I have nerves all my cool goes out of the window. Anway, hopefully going for another drink soon and I may have to play a bit of a waiting game. Bah.
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Well, went out with her again today to an art gallery (I thought I wouldn't enjoy it but actually it was alright) and we had a great time... we get along well and our humour is really similar. However, once again I lost my cool when we said goodbye, and came out with some awkward rubbish. Still not 100% sure if she likes me (though were I watching objectively over my own shoulder I'd say the signs were there) and I haven't even mentioned it yet.

This is apparently what happens when I really like a girl (she is literally wife material), which hasn't happened on this scale in my living memory. It's like she slows my brain down to the point where I lose sync with my mouth, I'm just not used to it, and normally girls like me more than I like them, so I feel more in control. I need to man up and sort this out asap! :eek:
 
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Fairly sure the answer is no said:
you sound like a guy who's making rash decisions now and isn't dealing with the situation very well. you broke up a few hours ago and immediately on a dating website.

sounds to me like she wants you but wants you to say look i can hear what you're saying and i'll see what i can do to be funner, but instead you say screw you i'm going to instantly look for someone else. she sounds like the lucky one here tbh. if i were you i'd tell her you're already online dating and looking for someone else so she need to move on as you're pretending you already have .
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Well, it sounds like she got lucky then :)

If I'm moving on this easily and been walking around the whole day as if a weight have been lifted off my shoulders, it wasn't right in the first place. What have I really lost here? Someone who demands for me to change whilst doing nothing in HER turn to keep ME around. I could say 'typical women behaviour' but it'll set off the alarms around here and I can't be bothered debating uninteresting pointless issues.

She's unhappy with her life and was hoping I could change it for her. That was her words. Not once, but countless times. If all you hear is how boring this relationship is and how you're doing nothing to make it better for her, would YOU stick around?

Obviously I can't place all the blame infront of her door. I could've been more understanding and talked this thing to death more than we already had, but it always seemed to be about HER. Her unhappiness, her lack of an interesting and fulfilling life. If I'm honest, I was already over her and this relationship for at least a couple of months before last night. No wonder I'm itching to jump back in the game.

Lastly, at one point last night I asked her if there's ANYTHING good about me at all. Anything she appreciates. She just shook her head. If you asked me, she wanted this thing dead. She just waited for me to pull the trigger.

And I should've stuck around for that?
 
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