Join the club, make me feel better?

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Talk to someone online. Not from a sleazy website but just a normal dating one.

If you even meet IRL and this person knows that you struggle to talk to people, they will most likely make an effort to make you feel comfortable.

Funny as it sounds there are women who like to make shy men outgoing.
 
FoxEye said:
I doubt anyone that knows me will be reading this forum.... could be wrong tho! It's a gamble... uploading atm.
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Just don't do it. What have you got to gain by posting a picture for these vultures?

As long as you're not a complete monster your looks have nothing to do with it, this is a psychological barrier that you've built.

All you need to do is get your first kiss/fondle/porking out of the way and then you'll be fine, seriously.

Just find a group of mates to go out drinking with and everything will happen. You've been avoiding it because you feel awkward, so you need to overcome that and then everything will happen on its own given time.

Your looks have NOTHING to do with this. Do NOT post your picture because this lot will tear you to shreds and make you feel worse than you do already.

In summary, DO NOT POST YOUR PICTURE
 
I get the feeling you could solve a lot of the social issues you describe by listening. Its one of the most common symptoms of people who feel like they are "boring" or somehow socially "broken".

When conversing with someone try not to think about what you will say next, instead listen to what they are saying. This applies to anybody you are talking too. People who get nervous in social situations make this mistake so often and it just adds to their awkwardness.

Some of the most engaging people you will ever meet will actually just be excellent listeners.

Seriously think about it and try it.
 
I spend so much time listening to everyone when I go out someone always pipes up. "Do you speak at all"

Yea awkward, thanks..****

#social retard!
 
I kissed about 18 girls in one night once. That was when I was a grotesque teenager. It's common knowledge that men get better looking as they get older (so naturally I'm a stunner now) so at 30 y/o OP, you prolly have nothing to worry about looks wise.

And women are often shallow things unless they find you have deep pockets. So go out on the lash and get some gash.
 
First off, some of these replies are very funny!

Forums are not a good place to learn how to talk to people. These forums make you keep your guard up when talking to normal people and make you pounce on little mistakes they make (it does with me anyway) and u come across as a tool/knob.

You can learn anything, even talking to people/girls.

I myself am getting back into the game but I am really finding it hard to approach, this has never happened before, this used to be the best part of my game. Fearless and didnt care what other people thought cause i am awesome and know it, maybe the ex has left a bigger dent in the ego than i first thought...

Im not quite sure what you are after OP?
looks ain't a bigger deal to girls as you might think. Sure it helps, but it will only take you so far.

I can only Echo what some people have said. You do have to feel good about yourself (i think this is my problem too atm). If you dont love yourself nor will anyone else.

And if you spend the weekend infront of the PC nothing will change either.

Ill be out every weekend until i fix my problem (it wont be long)

one last thing a kiss doesnt mean anything so kiss whoever even if u dont really like them.
DONT go home with people you dont fancy or ever plan to talk to again. i hate myself when i do that.
 
First of all I would say take up the gym and do it seriously. The gym is not easy to get into but if you do do it and you do it properly it gives you something to fixate on. This keeps your mind occupied and exercise drastically improves peoples moves over time. Furthermore you will develop a good body over time. This will boost your confidence in your self. I can assure you that once you have a good body you will find your self checking your self out a lot and thats a good feeling. Highly recommend, make it happen.

Secondly, anyone saying "just go to a club and pull" is talking poo. a lot less people do this then you might think and the people who do are repeat offenders because they have so much confidence. Confidence and alcohol make you a sex bomb. If you don't have the confidence in your self that just isn't going to happen and is only putting stress on your self. Not to mention at 30 you probably don't really want to be in a club.

Aim to make friends in the work place. Get things happening, meet ups. Even all guy meet ups, sooner or later a girl pops up. Most peoples girl friends were friends of friends at some point.

Where do you work? I only skim read so may have missed it. I think it's kind of sad that people are jumping on this thread. It's not needed and I highly suspect they aren't the babe magnets their keyboard wants you to think ;)
 
Alcohol gives you confidence.. If you wanna spend 5 years making a girl "friend" and then trying to get somewhere with her be my guest. Otherwise go out, get drunk, find a slapper, grind on it.. I don't see the problem. Confidence will come in time mate but you have to start somewhere. Whats the worst that could happen (Dr pepper), she could walk away. Thats 1 more rejection but its also more experience. Try and act a little bit awkward maybe as some girls may find this funny and thats a way in.
 
You need to change your status from Offline to Available.

OP, can I ask: Honestly speaking, why is it this has happened?

Have you had missed opportunities? Have you simply shut yourself away? Have you simply been unlucky?

At 30, you must at least know why you find yourself making this thread.

Chances are you've built these things up into your head so they're out of proportion with reality. When you do experience them, you'll either be sorely disappointed or trying to find blame, assuming it's because you've left it so late.

What exactly is it that you've found so hard?

I'd wager a guess that you suffer from social anxiety, at least midly. What you need are some friends who'll give you a strong, hard push in the right direction. Don't fanny around in the shallow end, afraid to wade in because your nuts might get cold. Dive in the deep end, get that head underwater and start swimming.

Also, please don't post a picture. Just be honest in giving us the facts.
 
save up £100. Book yourself an escort, no need to spend money on drinks, go into a night club... nothing. Saves a lot of hassle.

Seriously! at 30 and having never done anything that's what I would be doing. Once you've done it with one of them, you will have a bit more confidence to do it with someone else.

Plus the escorts probably going to be a lot better looking than someone you don't need to pay.
 
Nix said:
Also, please don't post a picture. Just be honest in giving us the facts.
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This. There are many sad acts in here trying to bait you for a laugh which is amusing as I would be willing to bet a lot that at least half of them are completely useless with women even if they don't want to believe it them selves.

Nix speaks a lot of sense. My email is in trust as well if you wanted to talk.
 
:( get to a new years party like Edinburgh if you still have not kissed a bird by the time it rolls around. You get epic tongue off loads of women at the bells why else do you think its jam packed :D

Also as has been said get a group of mates get totally plastered and then get one of the easy women at the end of the night its how the rest of us did it the first few times...
 
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