The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

[randomshenans]

I know I’m just average looks wise, I wouldn’t be good enough for her.

**** that ****. Looks ain't **** when it comes to "good enough for" anyone. I don't give a **** if anyone thinks I'm attractive enough for them, I'm beyond good enough for anyone. Before you even bother looking at someone to join your party of 1, work on loving yourself! You're way more than you would ever give yourself credit for

 

[Quartz]

but there’s plenty more fish in the sea.

This. Chin up!

 

[CaptainRAVE]

Yeah, don’t rate yourself on looks. The younger me did and it cost me a number of relationships since even when they showed interest I didn’t understand why they were interested and so didn’t respond. As I got older I realised there is far more to it and that I also probably wasn’t judging myself fairly, after all, ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ as they say.

 

[Roar87]

Accidentally walked past a girl I was attracted to today, I happened to look straight at her and she immediately turned her head sideways. I know this means she’s not attracted to me and I feel kind of sad about it but there’s plenty more fish in the sea. I know I’m just average looks wise, I wouldn’t be good enough for her.

She gets plenty of attention from men and can afford to be choosy. I suffer from mental health related problems too. Just a feeling of sadness at seeing her again and I wish I hadn’t.

You can create attraction through words and actions, these matter far more than how you look.

 

[SPG]

You can create attraction through words and actions, these matter far more than how you look.

In the wise words of the New Zealand football team.... Dont be a dick.

 

[NVP]

There's no such thing as an ugly man. Dress well, groom well, and stay healthy.

 

[MadMossy]

There's no such thing as an ugly man. Dress well, groom well, and stay healthy.

Have money, because with money all of the above would be available.

 

[azazl187]

The sad truth of it these days is that you need the looks to get your foot in the door and then the personality to go with it afterwards to make a success of it.

I'm married with two young kids and happy enough but if everything went bad and she divorced me I don't think I'd even bother with another serious relationship. They are just not worth it in regards to effort and maintenance

 

[Roar87]

In the wise words of the New Zealand football team.... Dont be a dick.

?

 

[SPG]

It wasn't aimed at you, the post above and it wasn't negative.

 

[413x]

The sad truth of it these days is that you need the looks to get your foot in the door and then the personality to go with it afterwards to make a success of it.

I'm married with two young kids and happy enough but if everything went bad and she divorced me I don't think I'd even bother with another serious relationship. They are just not worth it in regards to effort and maintenance

Don't think I would either. So many options and things to do now on your own that I think I'd genuinely be OK.

 

[azazl187]

Don't think I would either. So many options and things to do now on your own that I think I'd genuinely be OK.

Yea the amount of hobbies out there would keep you busy for years and years. Not to mention hooking up with mates and doing things

 

[malachi]

Yea the amount of hobbies out there would keep you busy for years and years. Not to mention hooking up with mates and doing things

That fades away when you get older and your mates settle down etc.

 

[azazl187]

That fades away when you get older and your mates settle down etc.

Maybe I'm lucky to be able to spend a lot of time on my own and be fine. It's also much more common for mate who are older to not have kids or more relaxed partners. I'm 40 and plenty of mates play golf every weekend without a worry in the world

 

[413x]

Yea the amount of hobbies out there would keep you busy for years and years. Not to mention hooking up with mates and doing things

So many options. My last holiday solo was my favourite holiday ever. Found a bunch who go MTB regularly I've joined up with. More and more groups around.

It no longer seems you have to be lonely if you live alone

 

[azazl187]

So many options. My last holiday solo was my favourite holiday ever. Found a bunch who go MTB regularly I've joined up with. More and more groups around.

It no longer seems you have to be lonely if you live alone

Yea the ability to just pick up your phone and have a phone call/text/video call with anyone at any time certainly helps.

 

[413x]

Yea the ability to just pick up your phone and have a phone call/text/video call with anyone at any time certainly helps.

Like you I m generally content doing my own thing. Going out on sea on kayak is really peaceful and serene its a lovely feeling.

As long as you can keep motivated I don't see too much of a loss. And you can always get a dog!

 

[Fuzz]

I know I’m just average looks wise, I wouldn’t be good enough for her.

She gets plenty of attention from men and can afford to be choosy. I suffer from mental health related problems too. Just a feeling of sadness at seeing her again and I wish I hadn’t.

HORSE ****..
Please take some time to listen to this uninterrupted.

#327 - Peter Crone - Defeat Your Limiting Beliefs

Episode · Modern Wisdom · Peter Crone is a performance coach to athletes, professionals and celebrities. The beliefs and subconscious narratives we hold shape our behaviour, health, relationships and performance. But by its very definition, the subconscious is difficult to tap in to. Expect to...

open.spotify.com

 

[gingergundog]

Accidentally walked past a girl I was attracted to today, I happened to look straight at her and she immediately turned her head sideways. I know this means she’s not attracted to me and I feel kind of sad about it but there’s plenty more fish in the sea. I know I’m just average looks wise, I wouldn’t be good enough for her.

She gets plenty of attention from men and can afford to be choosy. I suffer from mental health related problems too. Just a feeling of sadness at seeing her again and I wish I hadn’t.

Its true sometimes you need the initial attraction but looks become less important once you get to know someone and who's to say you would even gel together? You don't know what she was thinking anyway, could be a few reasons why she looked away, try and give her a smile and say hello if you pass her again. Maybe she doesn't fancy you, but like you say plenty of fish in the sea.

 

[nlel1975]

It’s true sometimes you need the initial attraction but looks become less important once you get to know someone and who's to say you would even gel together?

Yeah that’s true especially if the attraction isn’t mutual, she probably already knows that. No good if the attraction is one sided. Just need to forget about her, out of sight out of mind as they say. Plenty more fish in the sea.

Besides couldn’t see a pretty girl like that in the arms of an average joe like me, we’re physically incompatible. We just wouldn’t look right as a couple. I’m no Brad Pitt or Leonardo DiCaprio.