I’m under a psychiatrist and take antipsychotic medication but that doesn’t really help with the low self esteem, low self worth and self loathing. I’ve been on antidepressants before but they didn’t really help. I wish there was a quick fix to make me feel better about myself and my dating prospects.
I’m not ugly just not attractive and I find it hard to accept the way I look. Of course I’m going to be attracted to pretty woman I’m just a normal guy but I feel I repulse them. Wouldn’t even go to a prostitute as I’d feel too unattractive.
Sorry to read all this.
I used to be similar, I'm sure many have. Low self worth, feeling you aren't good enough. But it truly is all in the head. And confidence and self worth is everything.
Depression runs deep in my family on both sides.
You really need to stop saying things from other people's perspectives who you don't know. Because it's not healthy. It's insecurity and very common unfortunately. I can see it in your posts you are judging yourself from others perspectives and placing your value on that. If you don't value yourself no one else will.
No one would have wanted me when I was bad, I wouldn't have. And no one can truly fix you unless you want to be fixed.
For me (and it's different for everyone) what helped was setting tangible measurable goals. Primarily fitness. I have gaining a pound of muscle. Taking pics of myself and comparing month to month. It also gave me structure in my life. Routine. Going to gym 5 times a week. Going to classes was great.
Its sad (that looks mattered to me to much) but making progress at the gym, made me feel better mentally, I looked better, but more, I felt I looked better. My confidence grew. I stopped caring what others thought. I became myself. All good stuff!
I started wearing clothes I wanted, I would talk to girls in my gym class, I would talk to random people. That individualism showed through. Which only encouraged it.
As a tacky example I often like what would be considered girls colours. Now I wear that because I like it. I don't care. I even like standing out.
This comes from someone who was anxious about asking for help in supermarket! Who just wore black because others did.
Counselling and anti depressants didn't help that much but took edge off. But I tried everything. Try everything! If something doesn't work, at least you know.
Counselling, diet, gym, clubs, pubs, outdoors, anything that isn't sitting alone at home.
Really, point I'm making is it has to start with you. You have to try everything. And overall you have to want to want it. You can't go to gym (as am example) because you think you should go. You have to want it.
In an ideal.world I wouldn't care about my looks so much. And actually, as my confidence came I did care less about this.
There is no magic bullet. But you have to try. You have to want to change.
Sorry for the ramblings!
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. To be fair, we've both been sleepwalking into this for years, but the times we have had to turn it around haven't worked because (IMO) she's in denial about how bad it's been.
