Caporegime
- Joined
- 13 Nov 2006
- Posts
- 25,041
Sorry to hear what you're going through. If you can't stomach full meals try liquid food such as Huel. You need your health for your kids sake at the very least.
The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
- Start date
Sorry to hear what you're going through. If you can't stomach full meals try liquid food such as Huel. You need your health for your kids sake at the very least.
If you can don't leave till it's all sorted with solicitors etc, it will be mighty tough, but if you leave you'll have less chance of being able to stay and she'll likely warp it to say you walked out on the family etc so everything goes her way.
It's a tough business divorce, I've not been through it (close though) but my dad had a very messy divorce and as a male everything is stacked against you in the realms of solicitors and court, female/male equality does not exist in these realms even in the wokeness of the modern world.
The toughest bit is the toll it takes on the kids.
My dad was very lucky my mum made a stupid statement in court where she said she wasn't sure if she wanted to take us kids with her new life, up to that point the court was going to award her everything and leave my dad penniless, in the end they settled that dad got custody and the house but still had to pay her half of the house and all the belongings in it and she wouldn't have to pay any child support.
The biggest telling part of all of this is going to be if she ever actually files. I’m not planning on doing it yet.
Didn’t sleep at all. Waiting on solicitors to open so I can get an appointment. Thankfully she left this morning early for work so didn’t have to see her at all.
My oldest is 14 and keeps asking me when it’s going to be fixed. He’s well aware what is happening. Youngest is clueless and will remain that way while I can. She wanted to tell him. I said no for now.
Didn’t sleep at all. Waiting on solicitors to open so I can get an appointment. Thankfully she left this morning early for work so didn’t have to see her at all.
My oldest is 14 and keeps asking me when it’s going to be fixed. He’s well aware what is happening. Youngest is clueless and will remain that way while I can. She wanted to tell him. I said no for now.
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Soldato
A mistake I made was being a bit too open with my oldest. She was 15 when I told her what happened etc.
She didn't speak to her mother for 2 years straight.
Id try and limit the truth for as long as you can for their sakes.
She didn't speak to her mother for 2 years straight.
Id try and limit the truth for as long as you can for their sakes.
Soldato
I'm thinking of proposing, much like @Tefal as we will have been together for five years this year.
However, mine doesn't wear any jewellery, on account of being a veterinary surgeon and living in the horse yard, it makes my decision harder!
Ruined the surprise there haven't you!
Soldato
Mine doesn't wear rings. I'm going for
Orecchino Dioramour Oro giallo e diamante | DIOR
Come fossero disegnate a mano, le curve dell’emblematica collezione Dioramour delineano creazioni briose e originali. Minuziosi dettagli che si attorcigliano fra di essi come i fili dei tessuti lavorati con grande maestria negli atelier della Maison. O, U, I… tre lettere profondamente evocative...
Soldato
Mine doesn't have her ear pierced either!Mine doesn't wear rings. I'm going for
Orecchino Dioramour Oro giallo e diamante | DIOR
Come fossero disegnate a mano, le curve dell’emblematica collezione Dioramour delineano creazioni briose e originali. Minuziosi dettagli che si attorcigliano fra di essi come i fili dei tessuti lavorati con grande maestria negli atelier della Maison. O, U, I… tre lettere profondamente evocative...www.dior.com
And you left me hanging with the marriage proposal lol...
Soldato
Divorce. Been there myself. All went amicably thankfully and i see my daughter every day and me and ex get on really well. She even asked me over for Christmas day dinner! 31 years together too.
I have a feeling that is what she expected. If we had been through our options and agreed it didn't work then maybe. As it was, she chose and tore my heart out so I can't forgive that bit. Amicable yes for the kids. Friends no. Christmas dinner we have had our last as a family of 4.
Solicitors booked for Friday. £360 for the first hour...
Solicitors booked for Friday. £360 for the first hour...
Soldato
Blimey. Wish u all the very best.
Can I join the queue. I'd like to be firmly at the back but we're hitting year number 6 in a few months so it's only a matter of time until I have to join in
Number 8 for me.
I've got a few more years of making excuses yet then
Really, having lost 2 family members over the space of 3 weeks just before Christmas sort of put things into perspective for me. We've been together for almost 6 years, own a house together, have a child, cat and dog. It's not like either of us are going anywhere and we've got everything else ticked off...
But there is always a fun gadget that's more exciting to buy than a ring
I've got a few more years of making excuses yet then
Really, having lost 2 family members over the space of 3 weeks just before Christmas sort of put things into perspective for me. We've been together for almost 6 years, own a house together, have a child, cat and dog. It's not like either of us are going anywhere and we've got everything else ticked off...
But there is always a fun gadget that's more exciting to buy than a ring
Same really.
My gf lost her mum this year and would rather spend on holidays (and this year a camper van).
As you say, there's always something better to spend money on.
Also. Had 2 sets of friends break up one right before (weeks) the marriage. And one after (2 months in a 10 year relationship!).
So really.. There's no incentive to do it!
Neither does mineMine doesn't have her ear pierced either!
And you left me hanging with the marriage proposal lol...
If she says no I'm all yours
Soldato
Our first forum wedding surely!
FWIW we never planned to get married, we're not traditional at all and didn't fancy the palaver. But as we approached our 10th anniversary, and a few months after moving into the house we've bought, I was driving along without a care in the world...
Her: On our anniversary, shall we go to a registry office?
Me? (Squeaking)
ERRRRRRR DOYOUWANTTO?
We rolled the idea around our heads for a couple of weeks and it sounded like fun. Just us, no family or friends, get it done and that's that. Ended up being a lovely day. I took her to a local jeweller and we looked at his second hand selection and a ring with all the colours popped out. Partner tends to decorate the house like that and wears lots of bright colours so it fit her style!
FWIW we never planned to get married, we're not traditional at all and didn't fancy the palaver. But as we approached our 10th anniversary, and a few months after moving into the house we've bought, I was driving along without a care in the world...
Her: On our anniversary, shall we go to a registry office?
Me? (Squeaking)
ERRRRRRR DOYOUWANTTO?We rolled the idea around our heads for a couple of weeks and it sounded like fun. Just us, no family or friends, get it done and that's that. Ended up being a lovely day. I took her to a local jeweller and we looked at his second hand selection and a ring with all the colours popped out. Partner tends to decorate the house like that and wears lots of bright colours so it fit her style!
Nah, pretty certain that was Piggymon and Desmo.
Edit: your story is also same as ours in a way, almost 11 years together, finally got each other figured out after some rough spells and used the pandemic as an excuse to have a small wedding to commit the rest (hopefully) our lives to each other. She bought her own rings, I bought my own - how romantic
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