Okay, need to more vent/write this down so hope people done mind.
Me and my wife have been married for nearly 3 years in 2 weeks, once married we started trying for children, however she suffered from hypothalamic amenorrhea (basically she did too much exercise and didn’t eat enough so lost her cycle). She ended up having nearly 1.5 years of stopping all exercising and gaining a stone to eventually have it return, once it did obviously trying was her main priority and everything else just really faded away.
Therefore after around 4months and 2 small chemical pregnancy’s she finally got pregnant in December last year…. However this is when things took a turn as she went into full OTT hyper mode of pregnancy, I could touch her cause something would hurt I would hurt the baby, we couldn’t hug, we couldn’t do anything, in bed I had to keep distance and literally sleep on the edge. I really found the 9 months crap really, as everything was just baby and everything else was just me getting blamed for not saying how amazing and attractive I find her (sorry pregnancy doesn’t do it for me), however anything sexual was a no go. She spent a good 9 months training me to be someone who isn’t close and doesn’t do anything like that.
Roll on 3 weeks ago, our lovely baby Lara was born, she is brilliant, love her to bits, however me and my wife’s relationship I literally feel now is spiralling, as still even after a good 15months of “everything is to do with me” here we are in the same boat, except now everything no matter how small comes back to being my fault. So I bit my tongue through the 15months I don’t feel I should any more she should be happier now she has Lara and finally we can relax abit, however no….. I love spending time with my daughter but at the moment this is pulling me down so much im struggling just to be happy.
I have just been away in London for 3 days on business, the only texts I had were moaning about how I didn’t text to say miss you (I sent good night, love you), or she sent me a pic saying “ back in size 8 leggings”, I said “that’s good” she then proceeded to pop cause I didn’t say how good she looks in the photo…. Noting I am mid way through my work day etc.
I am just left feeling really really frustrated and annoyed by the situation and it leaves me not sleeping at night, the most awful thing is we have been through this 5 years ago, where she went into this same mode and keep trying to push me into doing things I didn’t feel I wanted to do, such as compliment etc even though im annoyed and all it did was push me away more. The only fix to that was a 4month break where we split up.
However now im worried as obviously I have my little girl……
Any other dads been through this or anything like it?