What's your take on bidets/bum sprays?

The wife insisted the carpet went (that photo is about 20 years ago). I like carpets in bathrooms, but concur those with wobbly aims or kids should best avoid them. I tend to pee outside if I am just back from the pub anyway. By the time I need to go again I've sobered up and have a reasonable aim ;)
 
Pfft. Carpeted bathroom is peek. It'll be on DIY SOS this year, mark my words. Here is mine:

Nowt wrong with it, don't be a slave to fashion, you won't smell any better or be any cleaner after spending thousands revamping it. Same with kitchens, your belly is just as fullk eating food prepared in a 1960's style kitchen as an ultra modern one.
 
I love how the majority of posters in here are coy even about where they live, yet are very eager to go into the minutiae of their toilet habits...

I favour the cleanliness of a bidet, there was already one in the bathroom when I bought this place, so I gave it a go and found it to my liking, even one of my peafowl approved.


peacock-in-bathroom.jpg
How is the bird involved in your cleanliness routine?
 
when i do a messy one and toilet paper isn't doing the job i have to put my hand up there to scrape the residue out. Then i get in the shower for a quick wash down. Am i the only one with this problem?
 
One of the latest trends is open plan en-suite (no walls) in bedrooms.

Firstly that’s going to be unhygienic and create mould/damp

Secondly, does anyone find it romantic to see their OH doing a poo and stinking the place out?
 
I love how the majority of posters in here are coy even about where they live, yet are very eager to go into the minutiae of their toilet habits...

I favour the cleanliness of a bidet, there was already one in the bathroom when I bought this place, so I gave it a go and found it to my liking, even one of my peafowl approved.


peacock-in-bathroom.jpg
Chris Wilson lives in a house with a carpeted bathroom and bath, a bidet and a peafowl. Why am I not surprised?
 
Chris Wilson lives in a house with a carpeted bathroom and bath, a bidet and a peafowl. Why am I not surprised?


<LOL> It's not carpeted any longer, somewhere I have a photo of one of the wallabies in the bedroom, but I think its on a back up tape. What's wrong with a peacock in the bathroom? At my age getting some bird on the floor in the bathroom requires creative thinking.
 

For all those somewhat disgusted by not using one, what the hell do you do at work or in other public places?

I grab toilet paper and put liquid soap on it, if there isn't any I put water on it.
There's no way I'm walking out of any bog not cleaning my botty with just dry paper.

What do you do in a public toilet of some description?

As above

That's fair enough. A quick Google and I see Severn Trent water have endorsed/approved these being flushed. I was going to say it's not the first time a manufacturer has claimed something that isn't quite true :)

I changed to toilet paper with liquid soap/water on it because Freefaller had a right go at me years ago for saying I used flushable wet wipes.
 
You can spot SexyGreyFox's place by the hosepipe going through the upstairs toilet window.... "They have a hosepipe by the side of the toilet"..... You should consider a job as the next UK ambassador to Pakistan <LOL>

"There's no way I'm walking out of any bog not cleaning my botty with just dry paper".

Has no one ever commented on this somewhat eccentric behaviour?
 
I see a few issues with the various tenchiques.

Toilet paper. Depending on the movement you could wipe until the cows come home and still find something on the tissue. For other movements the tissue might clean from first wipe. Get a good wedgie and I'm sure your underwear isn't going to smell too pleasant. For example when cycle touring you want to be a clean as possible.

Bidet, most of the ones in places I've lived have had a short combined tap/faucet at the back of the bidet, there's not enough pressure space to get fast running water over the offending area, so then you have to use your hand. Again depending on the type of movement, you could then end up with a hand literally covered in mess. How you then pick up the soap hand/hygiene wash to clean yourself? I find bidets are mostly used by women to wash their feet. Though strangely in my last place that had a bidet one girl told me she used the sink to wash her feet.

Shower, I have found to be the ultimate solution. The problem is that with a powerful shower you can inadvertently end up giving yourself a colonic irrigation. Otherwise it is a great way to get a nice clean feeling. Alternative is a sprayer on or next to the toilet.

Wipes, probably my second favourite solution but one used more often than any of the others. The standard flushable toilet wipes are trash. They aren't really wet enough and don't glide. Some break up better than others, but really best not to flush any. Make up/multipurpose wipes, are the winner in this category. You can get biodegradable plant fibre ones, unlike toilet wipes, they are larger and glide like butter from hot knife. Of course they need to be binned and not flushed, but not an issue, especially in countries where paper isn't flushed. Wipes do need to bulked up a little though with some tissue.
 
You can spot SexyGreyFox's place by the hosepipe going through the upstairs toilet window.... "They have a hosepipe by the side of the toilet"..... You should consider a job as the next UK ambassador to Pakistan <LOL>

They had them in Tunisia by the side of the toilets about 1 metre long.
Very easy to fit one to current toilets from the same water supply that fills the cisterns.
It's quite alarming you've never heard of them.

toilethosepipe.jpg
 
They had them in Tunisia by the side of the toilets about 1 metre long.
Very easy to fit one to current toilets from the same water supply that fills the cisterns.


Colonic irrigation?

I'll have a look in the garden shed, what a great idea, the wife will love showing her Mrs. Bouquet soiree guests the latest addition for their bathroom visit enhancement.

"Be sure to try the new hosepipe out by the toilet Daphne, it's from Tunisia". ;)
 
Colonic irrigation?

I'll have a look in the garden shed, what a great idea, the wife will love showing her Mrs. Bouquet soiree guests the latest addition for their bathroom visit enhancement.

"Be sure to try the new hosepipe out by the toilet Daphne, it's from Tunisia". ;)

Well at least we all know who has got a dirty bum in here, disgusting.
 
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