How many DINKs here?

adidan · 6 May 2023 at 15:31

We have never wanted kids. Never wanted a dog. We like both but time with either and we're glad to leave them and their mess to their owners.

We can handle a cat. Just about although that can sometimes feel a tad constraining on our love of travel and quiet.

chrismscotland · 6 May 2023 at 15:32

Currently a DINK and can't see that changing unless I got divorced!
Still means I can spend my own cash on cars, holidays and tech instead of kids!

Wizzkidy · 6 May 2023 at 15:37

Dink lol,

It's been many years since this was the case for the wife and I.

Had our first when I was 28, second when I was 32, third when I was 34 and then a set of twins when I was 36 (I'm 40 now)

The wife of course doesn't work and looks after the 5 of them but as you can imagine our household is absolute mayhem every day.

It's hard but you do get a sense of family and achievement for the things that you do each day.

We have strict routines in place that make life easier but they can sometimes go out the window.

What's really hit us hard is the cost of living, food being the most expensive and hard hitting, kids eat like troopers as they are constantly growing and are always hungry.

I think the weekly shop use to be £180 but since all this kicked off it's now more like £250 so as you can imagine it's incredibly difficult to budget when they have been use to a certain thing.

We obviously have not been on a holiday for many years apart from a trip here and there to the beach.

I very rarely buy anything for myself unless something breaks, one of the twins a year ago smashed my monitor so that has to be replaced

ttaskmaster · 6 May 2023 at 15:48

Haggisman said:
That makes no sense, of course a positive isn't a positive for someone it isn't a positive for *derp".

So how are they still "missing out", as you put it?

Participant · 6 May 2023 at 17:31

Personally I'm a DICK - double income, couple kids

bakes0310 · 6 May 2023 at 18:56

DINK I'm 37, wife is 29. No kids for our future due to health. But we can see the positives as time goes on and feel quite fortunate with how life takes us with just the two of us.

platinum87 · 6 May 2023 at 22:13

ttaskmaster said:
Why would people need a coping mechanism for not having something they don't want? There's nothing to cope with.
Like I said, there's no need for excuses. The only "particular behavioural conditions" are people who insultingly demand to know why someone doesn't want kids, as if there's something wrong with it...

As for you not believing them - That's just retarded and offensive.

Your hugely argumentative reply is itself a coping mechanism, the want is subconscious as is the excuse generation in some way. Its why many of people replying here are in long term relationships, hence the D from DINK.

LuckyBenski · 6 May 2023 at 22:47

platinum87 said:
Your hugely argumentative reply is itself a coping mechanism, the want is subconscious as is the excuse generation in some way. Its why many of people replying here are in long term relationships, hence the D from DINK.

You keep on trekking up that limb mate.

Diddums · 6 May 2023 at 23:00

platinum87 said:
Your hugely argumentative reply is itself a coping mechanism, the want is subconscious as is the excuse generation in some way. Its why many of people replying here are in long term relationships, hence the D from DINK.

"I ordered my physchology degree from Wish.com, the packaging was a bit tatty and it took a while to arrive but I'll win so many internet arguments now, I can't wait!"

413x · 6 May 2023 at 23:26

platinum87 said:
Your hugely argumentative reply is itself a coping mechanism, the want is subconscious as is the excuse generation in some way. Its why many of people replying here are in long term relationships, hence the D from DINK.

What is this coping mechanism?

Participant · 7 May 2023 at 08:02

bakes0310 said:
DINK I'm 37, wife is 29.

mid_gen · 7 May 2023 at 08:32

LuckyBenski said:
I'm 35 now and TBH have less and less interest in life, I'd very much like to be moving into a phase of dedicating my time and energy to being a good dad.

One of the things about not having kids....you need to have something to do with your life.

People with kids have no time or space for anything else in their lives, just having a job and bringing up kids fills their time (not passing judgement, just an observation).

I'm fortunate enough to have forged an interesting, rewarding and challenging career, and am very active in my free time. Having no kids and a tedious, soul-destroying job with no interesting hobbies is not a position you want to end up in.

If you have no kids, you gotta grab life by the danglies and do stuff you enjoy.

adidan · 7 May 2023 at 08:36

platinum87 said:
Your hugely argumentative reply is itself a coping mechanism, the want is subconscious as is the excuse generation in some way. Its why many of people replying here are in long term relationships, hence the D from DINK.

So if people don't want what you want they just don't know they subconsciously want it.

Maybe have a think about why your assumptions are both incorrect and patronising.

henry hoov3r · 7 May 2023 at 08:50

mid_gen said:
If you have no kids, you gotta grab life by the danglies and do stuff you enjoy.

Hard to argue with that. I wish i did more when I didn’t have kids.

adidan · 7 May 2023 at 08:58

Have a kids if you want.
Don't have kids if you want.
Some people want them and unfortunately can't have them, some have them and really shouldn't.

People should do their own lives and not presume other ways of living are wrong (unless in the case of people having them when they shouldn't, if you have kids you have to treat them well).

People should stop being so damned bothered by other people's lives.

dlockers · 7 May 2023 at 08:59

adidan said:
Have a kids if you want.
Don't have kids if you want.
Some people want them and unfortunately can't have them, some have them and really shouldn't.

People should do their own lives and not presume other ways of living are wrong (unless in the case of people having them when they shouldn't, if you have kids you have to treat them well).

People should stop being so damned bothered by other people's lives.

Yeah but unless folk breed a bunch of thickos whose going to wipe my ass in old age?

mid_gen · 7 May 2023 at 09:01

adidan said:
People should stop being so damned bothered by other people's lives.

But then what reason would cheesefest have for getting out of bed in the morning?

adidan · 7 May 2023 at 09:05

mid_gen said:
But then what reason would cheesefest have for getting out of bed in the morning?

I've not been posting here, relatively, that long.

I've seen a few digs from time to time about @cheesefest and I've never been sure why, nor do I want to know thanks.

ultralaser · 7 May 2023 at 09:54

DINK here to. I grew up without much, my parents probably should have chosen either not to have kids or to have less than they did which probably tints my view. Ironically I'm probably in a great position to have them if I wanted. I think if you find yourself in an environment with kids around (I.e. at friends who has them or in one of those family pubs) and think fondly of wanting them one day then you might be someone who should consider having them, if however you wish they where all transported to the moon and only allowed to return once they reach 18 you might be better off thinking of a different plan in life.

adidan · 7 May 2023 at 10:12

ultralaser said:
DINK here to. I grew up without much

Same, happy childhood though, didn't need much to be have good times. In fact, most of my fondest memories don't involve anything that needed much money, if any.

Spent a lot of time with family and a whack load of uncles, aunts and cousins. My brother needs that, he carried on the genepoool.

I've just never had the need nor want tbh. My friends have lovely kids, always thankful when we can get back to peace and quiet though.

They do them, I do me/we.