The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread

As much as we used to argue on here (under my old username, many years ago) my situation actually mirrors yours - word for word. It's like reading what's in my head apart from the abroad bit.

Hope you sort it mate.

Haha cannot remember that, I was young and foolish and I was probably in the wrong, sorry dude! :)

Me and the GF splitting up I can deal with, it's happened, nothing will change now, it's just going forward which is making me annoyed :(

It's like, I want to start going on the lookout for some new people, and have laid foundations for a few, but I think im too much of a nice guy (read: pussy) to just mess them about, especially one of them, she's just perfect lol :o

Would love to pursue something, but even if I did i'm moving to Canada next year if not sooner and I know for a fact that having a girlfriend would severely limit opportunities (Not like that lol :p Just the fact that if someone says "Lets do this totally random thing!" I'll end up being like "Can't seeing the GF.... :rolleyes:)

Anyone in Colchester fancy a beer lol? :p
 
Haha, I used to be a bit of a **** back then, we were as bad as each other. Don't worry about it, sorry too. :p

I always miss that when in a relationship - being able to go and do what I want, when I want.

If I have some funds I'll come for a beer sometime, haha. Only a few hours away. :p
 
Haha, I used to be a bit of a **** back then, we were as bad as each other. Don't worry about it, sorry too. :p

I always miss that when in a relationship - being able to go and do what I want, when I want.

If I have some funds I'll come for a beer sometime, haha. Only a few hours away. :p

Yeah deffo, but when i'm single, I really miss the gay things, like having someone to text and someone to just chill with and do nothing :o

ultra-gay.png


Example, I well fancy going to the zoo with an attractive lady, cause it's always a nice day but I feel like it's too much of a coupley thing to do, i'm clueless :confused:

Might just make Miniclip online pool my new mistress :p


Also, we both signed up nearly 5 years ago o.O
 
Here's my input lol.

Split up with my girlfriend of a year last weekend, it was on the cards and it was for the best as i'm moving abroad next year. Decided that I really don't want another relationship for a good while as i've been in one pretty much since I was 16,

But since breaking up with her, i've just found myself being bored and lonely when i'm not seeing friends and stuff.

Literally just come in from work, am shattered so can't be bothered to do much, but within 5 minutes im just sitting refreshing Facebook and OcUK over and over again, just need to vent really and ask for any tips on dealing with being mind bogglingly bored :(

Also,

There's a few ladies i'm talking to at the moment, but as said earlier, I don't really want to be in a relationship, but would like to get to know them better etc, what's the best way to approach this situation. This doesn't meant I just want to pound and run, if anything it's the opposite cause they're just my type lol :p

fml.


Ah Colchester my home town <3 I know it can be a fairly depressing town, I found going on epic bike rides out to the countryside done my break ups wonders there... just something to take your mind off it and have some time purely to yourself. As always just go out with your close friends for a few beers, I find human contact with your friends the best cure :)
 
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ALL PROBLEMS SOLVED!

My mates just flew out to Whistler for a year on Friday, I was going to join then next year, but just come off Skype and decided im going to go in August if I can get a visa lol :p

Small world, from my home town and now off to Whistler (spent 6 months over there few years ago). Have an epic time, pick up a bike from craigslist, get a job at Cow's ice cream and hit the trails on a belly full of ice cream :p
 
Small world, from my home town and now off to Whistler (spent 6 months over there few years ago). Have an epic time, pick up a bike from craigslist, get a job at Cow's ice cream and hit the trails on a belly full of ice cream :p

Already got a bike sorted, only costs 50 quid to get over there :)

Haha i'll deffo slam a resume into Cows Ice cream if you recommend it? :)
 
Already got a bike sorted, only costs 50 quid to get over there :)

Haha i'll deffo slam a resume into Cows Ice cream if you recommend it? :)

Ah nicely done, get in good with a local bike shop for free repairs and cheaper parts! Also don't forget CRC will ship out to Canada (which normally works out a lot cheaper) for spare parts etc!

Yup definitely, worked there for four months.. best job I have ever had :) Although saying that if you can get a job working for the mountain (through Whistler Blackcomb) you get a lift pass and discount on lots of shops but these are extremely hard to get purely because of the amount of people applying.

If you want any other info let me know
 
The time I've been spending getting over my last girlfriend has just surpassed the duration of the actual relationship. What's even worse is that the relationship was just 4 months long. Trying hard to sort it out (hobbies, travelling, going to gym etc.) but if I'm being honest, they're not working.

Don't even want to meet another girl at the moment, due to the melted brain from the last one. My only salvation at this stage looks like time. It's really ****ing me off though, as I'm 26 and could not be in a better position to just enjoy life, but I can't at the moment.
 
Could you link the thread then? Although your summary does seem like distilled wisdom.

The Breakup Megathread: Lushka16 severed, remains champ

Closure
This is probably the biggest reason people completely fail on Rule 2 and suffer.

Closure could mean one final “*** you,” a last hurrah in the sack, that satisfying answer to why everything fell apart and anything in between. Sadly, if you weasel anything out of your ex, you probably didn’t want to hear it in the first place.

Most often, there is no such thing as closure and nothing your ex could say would make you feel better. This is also nearly always has the same result: it never matters what they say, and now you feel even worse. Moral? Don’t bother looking for closure. Create your own and move on.

Can I Be Friends With My Ex?
Chocolate Milk posted:

Sure. You can be friends with your ex. But not now.

Most people don’t end up being friends with their ex, and it’s not because they stop talking to them. It’s because they don’t stop talking to them. You can’t be friends with someone you used to love unless all those feelings are gone. You need to take the time to be apart and to get some space. Otherwise you’ll never get over them; you’ll see them with new people and it’ll kill you inside. What kind of a friendship is that?

If you’re the dumper, it’s going to be harder for you, because you won’t really know for sure if they’re over you. Dating other people doesn’t guarantee anything. The important thing is to give them space (even if they don’t want space, even if they want to keep talking to you) and maybe try at being friends after a few months.


Well, there you have it. Get right to breaking every one of these and teach everyone your hard-learned lessons, or share your success and be a model for all.

Much thanks to all of the contributors to this and the last thread. You know who you are!

Many people have been where you are, and you can probably find your answer in history. READ the original thread here http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=1826659

Hugs to all :)
 
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The time I've been spending getting over my last girlfriend has just surpassed the duration of the actual relationship. What's even worse is that the relationship was just 4 months long. Trying hard to sort it out (hobbies, travelling, going to gym etc.) but if I'm being honest, they're not working.

Don't even want to meet another girl at the moment, due to the melted brain from the last one. My only salvation at this stage looks like time. It's really ****ing me off though, as I'm 26 and could not be in a better position to just enjoy life, but I can't at the moment.

What was your relationship like? How quickly did she move on after you split? because that can effect how long it takes for you to get over her.

But keep your chin up :) Things will get easier in time, you will meet a lovely girl who is suited to you, has loads in common with you and thinks the world of you :) there are millions of girls out there, so go and meet them :)

If its been over 4months now, you should change your attitude and the way your looking at life, spark up a conversation with a pretty girl while out on the town.

The prettier the girl, the more she will like the attention because most guys will be too scared to talk to her, so it works in your favour if you man enough to talk to her :)
 
What was your relationship like? How quickly did she move on after you split? because that can effect how long it takes for you to get over her.

magnolia says, "No." because it doesn't matter. "But magnolia," you whine, "I care about her!" And that's fine but you need to think about you.

But keep your chin up :) Things will get easier in time, you will meet a lovely girl who is suited to you, has loads in common with you and thinks the world of you :) there are millions of girls out there, so go and meet them :)

Completely agree :)

If its been over 4months now, you should change your attitude and the way your looking at life, spark up a conversation with a pretty girl while out on the town.

Absolutely agree with the first apart of this post and the second part, if you want to.

The prettier the girl, the more she will like the attention because most guys will be too scared to talk to her, so it works in your favour if you man enough to talk to her :)

If this works then do it. If it doesn't then do something else :)

Remains champ, people. Remains champ.
 
What was your relationship like? How quickly did she move on after you split? because that can effect how long it takes for you to get over her.

But keep your chin up :) Things will get easier in time, you will meet a lovely girl who is suited to you, has loads in common with you and thinks the world of you :) there are millions of girls out there, so go and meet them :)

If its been over 4months now, you should change your attitude and the way your looking at life, spark up a conversation with a pretty girl while out on the town.

The prettier the girl, the more she will like the attention because most guys will be too scared to talk to her, so it works in your favour if you man enough to talk to her :)
It was good, slow moving but that seemed to suit us both. We were both fairly busy. It ended just into the new year - despite her buying tickets for a show and weekend away in February for me at Xmas, which we subsequently never went on. She said she posted me the tickets (they hadn't arrived at Xmas), which I never got either.

Tried for a couple of weeks for answers, but the best I got out of her was "These things just happen, there doesn't have to be a reason.". So I left it at that. All a bit confusing to be honest. I don't know if she's moved on, she probably has, I removed her from Facebook and haven't spoken to her since. Quite sad really, but there hasn't been a day since I haven't thought about her!

I definitely need to change my outlook on life though, as my current state of mind is getting me nowhere. I'm pretty much wishing my life away, when I should be in fact doing the complete opposite. Cheers for the kind words chaps.
 
Well, I'm sad because a girl that I got along with really well, has not talked or replied to me for a little over two weeks now. Worse yet, I saw her earlier today, and rather than doing something socially normal, I just kind of glared at her, sat down at a nearby table and ate my lunch. I know, "man up and smash something else," "that doesn't even count as a relationship", blah, blah, I just sort of wanted to vent a little bit.
 
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