I really do think it's silly the amount of over thinking that's going in to this. Ask the girl out for a drink, if she says no leave it at that. If she says yes see how things go and post on the forums with sordid details about how you're winning at life!
The OcUK Relationship Counselling and Hugs Thread
- Thread starter mattyprice4004
- Start date
Just go for it, you'll be truly old one day and I don't think you'll look back and wish you hadn't tried it on with a gorgeous woman. Advice in here is terrible lmao
Can confirm this is a pro
Can confirm this is true
Can confirm it certainly does
Can confirm this is the correct answer
Unfortunately I suffer from a delusional disorder, the delusion of love see here…
https://www.news-medical.net/health/Delusion-Types.aspx
It’s a rare psychotic mental disorder which has led me to have a number of psychotic episodes when I either stopped taking the antipsychotic medication I’m on or it was not strong enough. It’s similar to schizophrenia.
The medication I am on now clozapine seems to be helping as I can think more clearly and rationally and recognize that it’s just a delusion and not real and that I’m just crazy. Sometimes I slip back into my delusion thinking but I’m able to rationalize and snap out of it.
For example thinking if only I’d asked her out on a date but even if I did I’d still have an unhealthy interest in her. After all is it normal to think about someone you haven’t seen for years and still have an interest in them despite never dating them or even knowing them.
Normal guys don’t waste their time and quickly move on, I get stuck in this delusion way of thinking that if I’d only done this or that. I now take more notice of non verbal cues and know when a girl doesn’t want to be approached or sees me as inferior by her body language, plus the medication is helping with that too.
https://www.news-medical.net/health/Delusion-Types.aspx
It’s a rare psychotic mental disorder which has led me to have a number of psychotic episodes when I either stopped taking the antipsychotic medication I’m on or it was not strong enough. It’s similar to schizophrenia.
The medication I am on now clozapine seems to be helping as I can think more clearly and rationally and recognize that it’s just a delusion and not real and that I’m just crazy. Sometimes I slip back into my delusion thinking but I’m able to rationalize and snap out of it.
For example thinking if only I’d asked her out on a date but even if I did I’d still have an unhealthy interest in her. After all is it normal to think about someone you haven’t seen for years and still have an interest in them despite never dating them or even knowing them.
Normal guys don’t waste their time and quickly move on, I get stuck in this delusion way of thinking that if I’d only done this or that. I now take more notice of non verbal cues and know when a girl doesn’t want to be approached or sees me as inferior by her body language, plus the medication is helping with that too.
51 dating a 26 year old? If it were a female dating a millionaire, then they both know what they are in the relationship for. But tbh, without the £££'s, it'd be a hard pass.
As much as i would love to be smashing a 26 year old at that age, it just doesn't seem right. Old enough to be her dad and old enough to know better. I think it would make work uncomfortable if people found out and even worse if the relationship crashes and burns.
As much as i would love to be smashing a 26 year old at that age, it just doesn't seem right. Old enough to be her dad and old enough to know better. I think it would make work uncomfortable if people found out and even worse if the relationship crashes and burns.
Soldato
Quoted the key point
Sod that, my crippled ass just doesn't have the stamina for that sort of nonsense these days!
Missus has decided now is the time to start trying for another baby... God help me!
Associate
- Joined
- 13 Sep 2010
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- 2,101
Yeah I think let this one go.....I can sympathise, but given the circumstances it's unlikely that she's given it any thought.
You look a lot better since buzzing off your hair (bald is a choice, balding is not
) but I don't think you're in the right place to pursue anything yet, unless it just happens organically and works - You need to be comfortable in yourself before you can be a good option for someone else.If you feel anxious speaking to women then that's something you can work on, take small steps but it will get less scary with time...it's completely ok to be rejected!
If she has any thoughts about me it’s most likely that I’m just another desperate weirdo who wants to sleep with her, if she wanted to sleep with me she wouldn’t think that way. Also the thought of me harboring any sexual thoughts about her makes her feel sick. I don’t anyway.
Plus my general attitude towards her whilst in hospital may have come across as arrogant because of my delusion confidence, and she is probably annoyed with me for that and for approaching her and checking her out whilst she was at work. After all she’s not my girlfriend or even a friend.
This would explain why she deliberately looked away to the side when our eyes accidentally met, she doesn’t want me to approach her and refuses to have eye contact with me. Goes back to what I said about us being strangers and not even friends.
Plus my general attitude towards her whilst in hospital may have come across as arrogant because of my delusion confidence, and she is probably annoyed with me for that and for approaching her and checking her out whilst she was at work. After all she’s not my girlfriend or even a friend.
This would explain why she deliberately looked away to the side when our eyes accidentally met, she doesn’t want me to approach her and refuses to have eye contact with me. Goes back to what I said about us being strangers and not even friends.
Happened to walk past this woman again today, that’s twice in a month after not bumping into her at all for 3 years. I believe in fate, anyway after clocking who it was I deliberately ignored her before she could ignore me, I can take a hint from last time.
Anyway I’m glad I’ve gone off her she’s glad I’ve gone off her so all is good. I felt good about ignoring her too, it was the right thing to do.
Anyway I’m glad I’ve gone off her she’s glad I’ve gone off her so all is good. I felt good about ignoring her too, it was the right thing to do.
Soldato
What would people say to a girl who dosnt reply for a day to messages? I went on third date with her yesterday we have been kissing since date two sometimes she reads my messages and never responds for ages.
I have never been in this situation before all have been responsive in previous dating / relationships. She says she busy working as a florist but im not sure she so busy she cant respond to messages I havnt challenged her on it yet as dont want to upset apple cart she really nice, she from Norway so dont know if its just there culture to be like this.
Ive been on 8 dates from Septemeber to December last year and most of the girls said no connection / spark so it ended at date one. I turned down a few aswell as didnt enjoy the dates, however this is first that gone past first date for me for a while. If roll back 3/4 years ago I used to get say casual hookup on a fairly consistent basis Ill be honest I wasnt going to turn down sex but ideally not what I wanted id love to find someone to travel the world with. I have been to 24 countries so seen the world and met quite a lot of people along the way so im not a stranger to talking, its partly in my job aswell on a daily basis.
Not sure if I just should end this or just challenge and see what happens? Ive always used internet dating in the past Im looking for a relationship but casual seems a thing of the past now even women have said to me there looking for relationship it like a total switch. I mean id take casual sometimes in the situation ive been in I felt ive been through a rollercoaster trying to find the one to connect with or like me on same level ive liked them.
I havnt really done approaching so much only on holidays but havnt lead to anything apart from a holiday fling or girls are in groups of two or more so its hard. Ive always relied on internet dating but when ive rated myself as 7 most girls said your 7.5 Im getting on abit at 36 now but not to brag ive met and been with some pretty women in my time. My mum always said I should join a club and meet someone like that but does that even guarantee you anything these days im not so sure.
Not sure how two of my friends met the women of there life on net dating so many years ago but been a total struggle for me its frustrating as all I want to do is find that one person.
I have never been in this situation before all have been responsive in previous dating / relationships. She says she busy working as a florist but im not sure she so busy she cant respond to messages I havnt challenged her on it yet as dont want to upset apple cart she really nice, she from Norway so dont know if its just there culture to be like this.
Ive been on 8 dates from Septemeber to December last year and most of the girls said no connection / spark so it ended at date one. I turned down a few aswell as didnt enjoy the dates, however this is first that gone past first date for me for a while. If roll back 3/4 years ago I used to get say casual hookup on a fairly consistent basis Ill be honest I wasnt going to turn down sex but ideally not what I wanted id love to find someone to travel the world with. I have been to 24 countries so seen the world and met quite a lot of people along the way so im not a stranger to talking, its partly in my job aswell on a daily basis.
Not sure if I just should end this or just challenge and see what happens? Ive always used internet dating in the past Im looking for a relationship but casual seems a thing of the past now even women have said to me there looking for relationship it like a total switch. I mean id take casual sometimes in the situation ive been in I felt ive been through a rollercoaster trying to find the one to connect with or like me on same level ive liked them.
I havnt really done approaching so much only on holidays but havnt lead to anything apart from a holiday fling or girls are in groups of two or more so its hard. Ive always relied on internet dating but when ive rated myself as 7 most girls said your 7.5 Im getting on abit at 36 now but not to brag ive met and been with some pretty women in my time. My mum always said I should join a club and meet someone like that but does that even guarantee you anything these days im not so sure.
Not sure how two of my friends met the women of there life on net dating so many years ago but been a total struggle for me its frustrating as all I want to do is find that one person.
Soldato
- Joined
- 25 Sep 2012
- Posts
- 3,189
If she doesnt reply then dont force it, ive not dated for a long time but pretty sure its not a good look.
Got to play it cool, dont be this guy
Got to play it cool, dont be this guy
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Man of Honour
You've brought it up, she's given her response. If that's not good enough for you then time to move on.
Soldato
Just one then waiting for a reply maybe some days two.
This is what I was thinking however does she just not have the cahoonas to say im not interested and stringing me along.
Guess im just used to most being honest on feeling after a date or just being ghosted usually the norm these days.
Keeping her options open is the most likely bet in that scenario, doesnt matter how busy a woman is if she is into you then she'll find time to message - after all it takes 30 odd seconds to send something like 'heya, swamped at work, message you later'
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